Robert knew well enough that Shargar would not drown himself without at
least bidding him good-bye; but he knew too that his grandmother could
be wrought upon. Her conscience was more tender than her feelings; and
this peculiarity occasioned part of the mutual non-understanding rather
than misunderstanding between her grandson and herself. The first
relation she bore to most that came near her was one of severity and
rebuke; but underneath her cold outside lay a warm heart, to which
conscience acted the part of a somewhat capricious stoker, now quenching
its heat with the cold water of duty, now stirring it up with the poker
of reproach, and ever treating it as an inferior and a slave. But her
conscience was, on the whole, a better friend to her race than her
heart; and, indeed, the conscience is always a better friend than a
heart whose motions are undirected by it. From Falconer's account of
her, however, I cannot help thinking that she not unfrequently took
refuge in severity of tone and manner from the threatened ebullition
of a feeling which she could not otherwise control, and which she was
ashamed to manifest. Possibly conscience had spoken more and more gently
as its behests were more and more readily obeyed, until the heart began
to gather courage, and at last, as in many old people, took the upper
hand, which was outwardly inconvenient to one of Mrs. Falconer's
temperament. Hence, in doing the kindest thing in the world, she would
speak in a tone of command, even of rebuke, as if she were compelling
the performance of the most unpleasant duty in the person who received
the kindness. But the human heart is hard to analyze, and, indeed, will
not submit quietly to the operation, however gently performed. Nor is
the result at all easy to put into words. It is best shown in actions.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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