“The vessel had a prosperous voyage till she arrived in sight of the
highlands near the entrance of the harbor of New York. It was then
that, just at evening, smart gusts began to blow off the land, and the
captain showed signs of anxiety, lest he should not be able to get
in before the storm, which he feared was coming, should arise. The
passengers had dressed themselves to go on shore, and most of them,
anxious to see friends, or tired of the sea, were anticipating their
arrival with delight. R., however, was an exception to all this. He
went upon the deck, looked a few moments gloomily at the land that was
visible low down in the horizon, and then retired to the cabin, where
he gave himself up to his accustomed train of discontented and bitter
thoughts.
“‘I alone,’ said he to himself, ‘of all this company, seem to be
miserable; all are looking forward with pleasant anticipations of some
happiness, some enjoyment in store for them. But for me--what have I
to hope? I have no friends here; this is a land of strangers to me.
It is true, I have wealth; but how worthless is it! I have tried its
virtues in England, and found that it could not give me pleasure.
Wealth cannot bestow happiness upon me; and I should not mourn if every
farthing of it were lost in the sea. Life is indeed to me a burthen.
Why is it that everything is happy but myself? Why do I see all these
people rejoicing at the sight of land, while I am distressed at the
idea of once more mingling with mankind? Alas! life is to me a burthen,
and the sooner I part with it the better.’
“While R. was pursuing this train of reflections in the cabin, the
heaving of the vessel increased; the creaking of the timbers grew
louder, and there was a good deal of noise on the deck, occasioned by
running to and fro, the rattling of cordage, and the clanking of heavy
irons. The commands of the captain became rapid and stern, and the
thumping of the billows against the sides of the ship made her shiver
from the rudder to the bowsprit.
“R. was so buried in his own gloomy reflections that he did not
for some time notice these events; but at last the din became so
tremendous, that he started to his feet and ran upon deck. The scene
that now met his eyes was indeed fearful. It was dark, but not so much
so as to prevent the land from being visible at a little distance; the
wind was blowing with the force of a hurricane, and urging the vessel,
now perfectly at its mercy, into the boiling waves that fretted and
foamed along its edge. The captain had given up all hope of saving the
ship, and the passengers were kneeling and throwing up their hands in
wildness and despair.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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