"Oh, she attacks the outside of the cup and platter; you question
motive power and ideals. Well, I confess I have less of the former
than I ought, and more of the latter than I've ever used." Lavendar
had rested on his oars now and was looking down, so that the twinkle
of his eyes was lost. "I suppose I shall go on as I have done
hitherto, doing my work in a sort of a way, and getting a certain
amount of pleasure out of things,--unless--"
"Oh, but that's not living!" she exclaimed; "that's only existing.
Don't you remember:--
It is not growing like a tree
In bulk doth make man better be.
It's really _living_ I mean, forgetting the things that are behind,
and going on and on to something ahead, whatever one's aim may be."
"What are you going to do with yourself, if I may ask?" said Lavendar.
"Don't be too philanthropic, will you? You're so delightfully
symmetrical now!"
"I shall have plenty to do," cried Robinette ardently. "I've told you
before, I have so much motive power that I don't know how to use it."
"How about sharing a little of it with a friend!"
Lavendar's voice was full of meaning, but Robinette refused to hear
it. She had succumbed as quickly to his charm as he to hers, but while
she still had command over her heart she did not intend parting with
it unless she could give it wholly. She knew enough of her own nature
to recognize that she longed for a rowing, not a drifting mate, and
that nothing else would content her; but her instinct urged that
Lavendar's indecisions and his uncertainties of aim were accidents
rather than temperamental weaknesses. She suspected that his
introspective moods and his occasional lack of spirits had a definite
cause unknown to her.
"I haven't a large income," she said, after a moment's silence,
changing the subject arbitrarily, and thereby reducing her companion
to a temporary state of silent rage.
"Yet no one would expect a woman like this to fall like a ripe plum
into a man's mouth," he thought presently; "she will drop only when
she has quite made up her mind, and the bough will need a good deal of
shaking!"
"I haven't a large income," repeated Robinette, while Lavendar was
silent, "only five thousand dollars a year, which is of course
microscopic from the American standpoint and cost of living; so I
can't build free libraries and swimming baths and playgrounds, or do
any big splendid things; but I can do dear little nice ones, left
undone by city governments and by the millionaires. I can sing, and
read, and study; I can travel; and there are always people needing
something wherever you are, if you have eyes to see them; one needn't
live a useless life even if one hasn't any responsibilities. But"--she
paused--"I've been talking all this time about my own plans and
ambitions, and I began by asking yours! Isn't it strange that the
moment one feels conscious of friendship, one begins to want to know
things?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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