Families -- Fiction; Theater -- Great Britain -- Fiction
“Well, they haven’t starved her at this convent,” the old landlady
declared after she had embraced Letizia and presented her cousin, Mrs.
Williams, the pleasant and hospitable woman in whose house they were to
stay. “I was very doubtful about the idea when you settled to put her
in this convent, because I’ve always had a horror of nuns, and which is
why I’ve never been to see her. I know I read a story once about a pore
girl they bricked up, and it gave me the horrors to that extent it was
weeks before I could go down into the cellar and fetch up a scuttle of
coal. But the child’s looking a regular nosegay. What do they give you
to eat, duckie?”
“Oh, we have breakfast and dinner and tea and supper, and a glass of
milk at eleven,” Letizia said.
“You do?” Mrs. Pottage exclaimed. “Oh, dear, oh, dear, they regular
gormingdise you! I’ve got it all wrong about nuns. I suppose it’s the
name that sounds so empty. But certainly I fancied if you had two
slices of dry bread and a glass of water you thought you’d done well
for one day.”
“Mrs. Pottage, when shall we go paddling?” Letizia asked persuasively.
“Paddling?” said Mrs. Pottage. “You surely don’t expect me to go
paddling?”
“Well, of course you must paddle,” Letizia exclaimed. “Don’t you know
we’re at the seaside?”
“But if I take off my shoes and stockings and pull up my skirts they’ll
think the British Museum’s broken loose,” said Mrs. Pottage. “You
haven’t seen my legs, duckie. Talk about marble columns. Well, my
legs would make a marble column look like a knitting-needle. Besides,
supposing I got my toe bit off by a kipper?”
The next morning, armed with several baskets of strawberries and a
large green-lined gingham umbrella, Mrs. Pottage set out with Nancy
and Letizia to savour the delights of Margate beach.
“Fine weather for a sail, mum,” said one of the longshoremen.
“Yes, but you’d be the one that was sold,” Mrs. Pottage retorted.
“Nice day for a row, mum,” suggested another longshoreman. “A shilling
the first hour, and sixpence every hour afterwards.”
“Who do you think I am?” Mrs. Pottage demanded. “Grace Darling? No,
thanks, young man, I’d sooner spend the money on winkles.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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