And then, just when she had been so drawn towards him by his strength
and kindness--that brusk blow in the face. Marise had felt many times
before this a thin, keen blade slipped into her back by a hand that took
care to be invisible. But never before had she encountered open
roughness. It was staggering! Breath-taking! Always, as she remembered
it, her first thought was, as it had been then, a horrified wonder why
any one should wish to hurt her. Always afterward with the memory of his
dreadful, stammering distress, his remorseful kissing of her hands, his
helpless inability to unsay what he had said, she knew once more, as she
had known then, that she had encountered something new, something
altogether different from any human relationship she had ever known, a
relationship where you did not say things in order to please or
displease people, or to make this or that impression, but because you
thought they were true. That was fine--oh, yes, that was fine. But it
was like dashing yourself against hard stones--it hurt! And it made her
fear the hand that had hurt her. She watched it, and sometimes all but
put out her fingers to touch it, to see if it were really so strong and
hard as it looked. She feared it. She envied its strength.
III
That had been a stroke of the portrait-painting brush which frightened
her to remember. But there were others that made her laugh, like the
time, off in a hill-village in the Roman country-side, when he stepped
into a little shop to buy a box of cigarettes, and came back with a
great paper-bag of the villainous, hay-like tobacco issued to the
Italian army, unsmokable by any but an Italian private soldier. To their
amazed laughter, he had replied sheepishly, with a boy's grin of
embarrassment that the little daughter of the shop-keeper, ambitiously
doing her best to wait on a customer, had misunderstood his order and
had weighed it out and tied it up before he realized what she was doing.
"I was afraid if I let them know she'd made a mistake her father would
jump on her. Fathers do seem to do such a tall amount of scolding
anyhow. And she was so set up over having made a sale all by herself."
Marise had laughed with the others over that, and laughed when she
thought of it--but her laugh often ended abruptly in bewilderment--how
was it he could be so kind, so tenderly kind to an Italian child he had
never seen before, and so sternly rough with her? That rankled; and
then, when she had had time to think, she recognized it, all over again,
with the same start of astonishment, for the truth-telling she had never
encountered.
IV
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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