England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
“What would your ladyship have me to do?” he once said to my Lady
Ludlow, when she wished him to go and see a poor man who had broken his
leg. “I cannot piece the leg as the doctor can; I cannot nurse him as
well as his wife does; I may talk to him, but he no more understands me
than I do the language of the alchemists. My coming puts him out; he
stiffens himself into an uncomfortable posture, out of respect to the
cloth, and dare not take the comfort of kicking, and swearing, and
scolding his wife, while I am there. I hear him, with my figurative
ears, my lady, heave a sigh of relief when my back is turned, and the
sermon that he thinks I ought to have kept for the pulpit, and have
delivered to his neighbours (whose case, as he fancies, it would just
have fitted, as it seemed to him to be addressed to the sinful), is all
ended, and done for the day. I judge others as myself; I do to them as I
would be done to. That’s Christianity, at any rate. I should
hate--saving your ladyship’s presence--to have my Lord Ludlow coming and
seeing me, if I were ill. ’Twould be a great honour, no doubt; but I
should have to put on a clean nightcap for the occasion; and sham
patience, in order to be polite, and not weary his lordship with my
complaints. I should be twice as thankful to him if he would send me
game, or a good fat haunch, to bring me up to that pitch of health and
strength one ought to be in, to appreciate the honour of a visit from a
nobleman. So I shall send Jerry Butler a good dinner every day till he
is strong again; and spare the poor old fellow my presence and advice.”
My lady would be puzzled by this, and by many other of Mr. Mountford’s
speeches. But he had been appointed by my lord, and she could not
question her dead husband’s wisdom; and she knew that the dinners were
always sent, and often a guinea or two to help to pay the doctor’s
bills; and Mr. Mountford was true blue, as we call it, to the back-bone;
hated the dissenters and the French; and could hardly drink a dish of
tea without giving out the toast of “Church and King, and down with the
Rump.” Moreover, he had once had the honour of preaching before the King
and Queen, and two of the Princesses, at Weymouth; and the King had
applauded his sermon audibly with,--“Very good; very good;” and that was
a seal put upon his merit in my lady’s eyes.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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