Rule a Wife, and Have a Wife: Beaumont & Fletcher's Works (3 of 10)Fletcher, John
General
Rule a Wife, and Have a Wife: Beaumont & Fletcher's Works (3 of 10)
Fletcher, John
Comedy plays; Drama
If we should play now, you must supply me.
Cacafogo:
You must pawn a Horse troop,
And then have at ye Colonel.
Sanchio:
Come, let's go:
This Rascal will make rare sport; how the Ladies
Will laugh at him?
Juan de Castro:
If I light on him I'll make his Purse sweat too.
Cacafogo:
Will ye lead, Gentlemen?
[Exeunt.
[Enter _Perez_, an old Woman, and Maid.]
Michael Perez:
Nay, pray ye come out, and let me understand ye,
And tune your pipe a little higher, Lady;
I'll hold ye fast: rub, how came my Trunks open?
And my Goods gone, what Pick-lock Spirit?
Old Woman:
Ha, what would ye have?
Michael Perez:
My Goods again, how came my Trunks all open?
Old Woman:
Are your Trunks open?
Michael Perez:
Yes, and Cloaths gone,
And Chains, and Jewels: how she smells like hung Beef,
The Palsey, and Picklocks, fye, how she belches,
The Spirit of Garlick.
Old Woman:
Where's your Gentlewoman?
The young fair Woman?
Michael Perez:
What's that to my question?
She is my wife, and gone about my business.
Maid:
Is she your Wife, Sir?
Michael Perez:
Yes Sir, is that wonder?
Is the name of Wife unknown here?
Old Woman:
Is she truly, truly your Wife?
Michael Perez:
I think so, for I married her;
It was no Vision sure!
Maid:
She has the Keys, Sir.
Michael Perez:
I know she has, but who has all my goods, Spirit?
Old Woman:
If you be married to that Gentlewoman,
You are a wretched man, she has twenty Husbands.
Maid:
She tells you true.
Old Woman:
And she has cozen'd all, Sir.
Michael Perez:
The Devil she has! I had a fair house with her,
201] That stands hard by, and furnisht royally.
Old Woman:
You are cozen'd too, 'tis none of hers, good Gentleman.
Maid:
The Lady _Margarita_, she was her Servant,
And kept the house, but going from her, Sir,
For some lewd tricks she plaid.
Michael Perez:
Plague o' the Devil,
Am I i'th' full Meridian of my Wisedom
Cheated by a stale Quean! what kind of Lady
Is that that owes the House?
Old Woman:
A young sweet Lady.
Michael Perez:
Of a low stature?
Old Woman:
She is indeed but little, but she is wondrous fair.
Michael Perez:
I feel I am cozen'd;
Now I am sensible I am undone,
This is the very Woman sure, that Cousin
She told me would entreat but for four days,
To make the house hers; I am entreated sweetly.
Maid:
When she went out this morning, that I saw, Sir,
She had two Women at the door attending,
And there she gave 'em things, and loaded 'em,
But what they were--I heard your Trunks to open,
If they be yours?
Michael Perez:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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