Stainton smiled indulgently. He put a strong arm about her and patted
her shoulder.
"Yes, any sons, dear," he said. "Did you never think of that? Did you
never think how sweet it would be if we two that are one should really
see ourselves made one in a little baby?"
To his amazement she burst into tears.
"I don't want a baby!" she wailed, her head on his shoulder, her hands
clasped behind him. "I don't want a baby. No, no, no!"
He tried to persuade her, but he could scarcely make himself heard until
he abandoned the topic.
"There, there," he said, "it's all right. I wouldn't hurt you, dearest;
you know I wouldn't. There will be nothing to worry about."
His heart ached because he had hurt her. He told himself that he should
have remembered that her present nervous condition could not be normal.
He upbraided himself for making to her, no matter how long he might have
been married to her, a frank proposition that her sensitive nature
probably repelled only because of the matter-of-fact way in which he had
suggested what, he thought, should have been more delicately put. He did
not change his design; he merely ceased to speak of it. Throughout the
world the only persons not consulted about the possible bearing of
children are the only persons able to bear them. Stainton no longer made
an exception of Muriel. He decided that the best management of these
matters was to leave them to chance for their occurrence and nature for
their acceptance.
This conversation took place a week or more after their verbal
banishment of sunsets. On the night following, Jim at the demand of his
abounding health, fell asleep earlier than usual and slept, as always,
soundly; but his wife chanced to be nervous and restless. She lay long
awake and she was lonely. Twice she wished to rouse him for her
comforting; twice she refrained. When, finally, she did sleep, her sleep
was heavy, and she awoke late to find him gone. She hurried into the
sitting-room, but he was not there, and it was quite ten minutes later
when he returned, fully dressed and glowing, a newspaper in his hand.
"Where on earth have you been?" she asked. She had crawled back into
bed, and she looked very beautiful as she lay there, her black hair wide
upon the pillows and the lacy sleeves of her night-dress brushed high on
her wide-flung arms.
"Downstairs. You were fast asleep and you looked so comfy I hadn't the
heart to waken you. It's a wonderful morning----"
"But, Jim, I woke up all alone! I was afraid!"
He sat on the bed beside her. He took her in his arms, flattered. He
gave her the chuckling consolation that the strong, knowing their
strength, vouchsafe the weak. He was sorry that she should have felt
badly, but he was immensely proud that she should be dependent.
"Too bad, too bad!" he said. "But it won't happen again. Next time I'll
either rouse you or else sit tight till your dear eyes open of their own
accord."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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