Domestic fiction; England -- Fiction; Mothers and sons -- Fiction; Religious fiction; Unmarried mothers -- Fiction
To the nurse's infinite relief, Ruth turned away, humbly and meekly,
with bent head, and slow, uncertain steps. But as she turned, she saw
the mild sad face of the deformed gentleman, who was sitting at the
open window above the shop; he looked sadder and graver than ever;
and his eyes met her glance with an expression of deep sorrow. And
so, condemned alike by youth and age, she stole with timid step into
the house. Mr Bellingham was awaiting her coming in the sitting-room.
The glorious day restored all his buoyancy of spirits. He talked
gaily away, without pausing for a reply; while Ruth made tea, and
tried to calm her heart, which was yet beating with the agitation of
the new ideas she had received from the occurrence of the morning.
Luckily for her, the only answers required for some time were
mono-syllables; but those few words were uttered in so depressed and
mournful a tone, that at last they struck Mr Bellingham with surprise
and displeasure, as the condition of mind they unconsciously implied
did not harmonise with his own.
"Ruth, what is the matter this morning? You really are very
provoking. Yesterday, when everything was gloomy, and you might have
been aware that I was out of spirits, I heard nothing but expressions
of delight; to-day, when every creature under heaven is rejoicing,
you look most deplorable and woe-begone. You really should learn to
have a little sympathy."
The tears fell quickly down Ruth's cheeks, but she did not speak.
She could not put into words the sense she was just beginning to
entertain of the estimation in which she was henceforward to be held.
She thought he would be as much grieved as she was at what had taken
place that morning; she fancied she should sink in his opinion if she
told him how others regarded her; besides, it seemed ungenerous to
dilate upon the suffering of which he was the cause.
"I will not," thought she, "embitter his life; I will try and be
cheerful. I must not think of myself so much. If I can but make him
happy, what need I care for chance speeches?"
Accordingly, she made every effort possible to be as light-hearted as
he was; but, somehow, the moment she relaxed, thoughts would intrude,
and wonders would force themselves upon her mind; so that altogether
she was not the gay and bewitching companion Mr Bellingham had
previously found her.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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