'You need not,' she observed, with a touch of hardness. 'I have been so
unhappy, that I can never be as unhappy again. Nothing matters now. All I
wish is to save enough money to be able to live quietly in a little
cottage in the country.'
'With your child,' I put in.
'My child will grow up and leave me. He will become a man, and he will
forget his _petite mère.'_
'Do not talk like that,' I protested.
She glanced at me almost savagely. I was astonished at the sudden change
in her face.
'Why not?' she inquired coldly. 'Is it not true, then? Do you still
believe that there is any difference between one man and another?
They are all alike--all, all, all! I know. And it is we who suffer,
we others.'
'But surely you have some tender souvenir of your child's father?' I
said.
'Do I know who my child's father is?' she demanded. 'My child has
thirty-six fathers!'
'You seem very bitter,' I said, 'for your age. You are much younger
than I am.'
She smiled and shook her honey-coloured hair, and toyed with the ribbons
of her _peignoir_.
'What I say is true,' she said gently. 'But, there, what would you have?
We hate them, but we love them. They are beasts! beasts! but we cannot do
without them!'
Her eyes rested on Diaz for a moment. He slept without the least sound,
the stricken and futile witness of our confidences.
'You will take him away from Paris soon, perhaps?' she asked.
'If I can,' I said.
There was a sound of light footsteps on the stair. They stopped at the
door, which I remembered we had not shut. I jumped up and went into the
passage. Another girl stood in the doorway, in a _peignoir_ the exact
counterpart of my first visitor's, but rose-coloured. And this one, too,
was languorous and had honey-coloured locks. It was as though the
mysterious house was full of such creatures, each with her secret lair.
'Pardon, madame,' said my visitor, following and passing me; and then to
the newcomer: 'What is it, Alice?'
'It is Monsieur Duchatel who is arrived.'
'Oh!' with a disdainful gesture. '_Je m'en fiche._ Let him go.'
'But it is the nephew, my dear; not the uncle.'
'Ah, the nephew! I come. _Bon soir, madams, et bonne nuit_.'
The two _peignoirs_ fluttered down the stairs together. I returned to my
Diaz, and seeing his dressing-gown behind the door of the bedroom, I took
it and covered him with it.
IV
His first words were:
'Magda, you look like a ghost. Have you been sitting there like that all
the time?'
'No,' I said; 'I lay down.'
'Where?'
'By your side.'
'What time is it?'
'Tea-time. The water is boiling.
'Was I dreadful last night?'
'Dreadful? How?'
'I have a sort of recollection of getting angry and stamping about. I
didn't do anything foolish?'
'You took a great deal too much of my sedative,' I answered.
'I feel quite well,' he said; 'but I didn't know I had taken any
sedative at all. I'm glad I didn't do anything silly last night.'
I ran away to prepare the tea. The situation was too much for me.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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