The last Sunday, sunny and bright! Though he did not ask her to go,
Gratian went to every Service that day. And the sight of her, after this
long interval, in their old pew, where once he had been wont to see his
wife's face, and draw refreshment therefrom, affected Pierson
more than anything else. He had told no one of his coming departure,
shrinking from the falsity and suppression which must underlie every
allusion and expression of regret. In the last minute of his last sermon
he would tell them! He went through the day in a sort of dream. Truly
proud and sensitive, under this social blight, he shrank from all alike,
made no attempt to single out supporters or adherents from those who
had fallen away. He knew there would be some, perhaps many, seriously
grieved that he was going; but to try and realise who they were, to
weigh them in the scales against the rest and so forth, was quite
against his nature. It was all or nothing. But when for the last time of
all those hundreds, he mounted the steps of his dark pulpit, he showed
no trace of finality, did not perhaps even feel it yet. For so beautiful
a summer evening the congregation was large. In spite of all reticence,
rumour was busy and curiosity still rife. The writers of the letters,
anonymous and otherwise, had spent a week, not indeed in proclaiming
what they had done, but in justifying to themselves the secret fact
that they had done it. And this was best achieved by speaking to their
neighbours of the serious and awkward situation of the poor Vicar.
The result was visible in a better attendance than had been seen since
summer-time began.
Pierson had never been a great preacher, his voice lacked resonance and
pliancy, his thought breadth and buoyancy, and he was not free from,
the sing-song which mars the utterance of many who have to speak
professionally. But he always made an impression of goodness and
sincerity. On this last Sunday evening he preached again the first
sermon he had ever preached from that pulpit, fresh from the honeymoon
with his young wife. “Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like
one of these.” It lacked now the happy fervour of that most happy
of all his days, yet gained poignancy, coming from so worn a face and
voice. Gratian, who knew that he was going to end with his farewell, was
in a choke of emotion long before he came to it. She sat winking away
her tears, and not till he paused, for so long that she thought his
strength had failed, did she look up. He was leaning a little forward,
seeming to see nothing; but his hands, grasping the pulpit's edge,
were quivering. There was deep silence in the Church, for the look of
his face and figure was strange, even to Gratian. When his lips parted
again to speak, a mist covered her eyes, and she lost sight of him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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