Then, the sense of beauty stirred in him; he moved where he could see
its flanks coated in silver by the moonlight, the ribs and the great
muscles, and the tail with tip coiled over the haunch, like the head of
a serpent. It was weirdly living; fine and cruel, that great man-made
thing. It expressed something in the soul of man, pitiless and remote
from love—or rather, the remorselessness which man had seen, lurking
within man's fate. Pierson recoiled from it, and resumed his march
along the Embankment, almost deserted in the bitter cold. He came to
where, in the opening of the Underground railway, he could see the
little forms of people moving, little orange and red lights glowing.
The sight arrested him by its warmth and motion. Was it not all a dream?
That woman and her daughter, had they really come? Had not Noel been but
an apparition, her words a trick which his nerves had played him?
Then, too vividly again, he saw her face against the dark stuff of the
curtain, the curve of her hand plucking at her blouse, heard the sound
of his own horrified: “Nollie!” No illusion, no deception! The
edifice of his life was in the dust. And a queer and ghastly company
of faces came about him; faces he had thought friendly, of good men and
women whom he knew, yet at that moment did not know, all gathered round
Noel, with fingers pointing at her. He staggered back from that vision,
could not bear it, could not recognise this calamity. With a sort of
comfort, yet an aching sense of unreality, his mind flew to all those
summer holidays spent in Scotland, Ireland, Cornwall, Wales, by mountain
and lake, with his two girls; what sunsets, and turning leaves, birds,
beasts, and insects they had watched together! From their youthful
companionship, their eagerness, their confidence in him, he had known so
much warmth and pleasure. If all those memories were true, surely this
could not be true. He felt suddenly that he must hurry back, go straight
to Noel, tell her that she had been cruel to him, or assure himself
that, for the moment, she had been insane: His temper rose suddenly,
took fire. He felt anger against her, against every one he knew, against
life itself. Thrusting his hands deep into the pockets of his thin black
overcoat, he plunged into that narrow glowing tunnel of the station
booking-office, which led back to the crowded streets. But by the time
he reached home his anger had evaporated; he felt nothing but utter
lassitude. It was nine o'clock, and the maids had cleared the dining
table. In despair Noel had gone up to her room. He had no courage left,
and sat down supperless at his little piano, letting his fingers
find soft painful harmonies, so that Noel perhaps heard the faint far
thrumming of that music through uneasy dreams. And there he stayed, till
it became time for him to go forth to the Old Year's Midnight Service.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account