Sam in the SuburbsWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
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Sam in the Suburbs
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
England -- Fiction; Gangsters -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Publishers and publishing -- Fiction
“I was. But I won’t if you don’t want me to. Aren’t they good?”
“Good? My dear old soul,” said Mr. Braddock earnestly, “they are Clara’s
worst effort--absolutely her very worst. I had to eat one because she
came and stood over me and watched me do it. It beats me why you don’t
sack that girl. She’s a rotten cook.”
“Sack Claire?” Kay laughed. “You might just as well try to sack her
mother.”
“I suppose you’re right.”
“You can’t sack a Lippett.”
“No, I see what you mean. I wish she wasn’t so dashed familiar with a
fellow, though.”
“Well, she has known you almost as long as I have. Mrs. Lippett has
always been a sort of mother to you, so I suppose Claire regards herself
as a sort of sister.”
“Yes, I suppose it can’t be helped,” said Mr. Braddock bravely. He
glanced at his watch. “Ought to be going and dressing. I’ll find you out
here before I leave?”
“Oh, yes.”
“Well, I’ll be pushing along. I say, you do think that story about the
Irishman is all right?”
“Best thing I ever heard,” said Kay loyally.
For some minutes after he had left her she sat back in her chair with
her eyes closed, relaxing in the evening stillness of this pleasant
garden.
“Finished with the tea, Miss Kay?”
Kay opened her eyes. A solid little figure in a print dress was standing
at her side. A jaunty maid’s cap surmounted this person’s tow-coloured
hair. She had a perky nose and a wide, friendly mouth, and she beamed
upon Kay devotedly.
“Brought you these,” she said, dropping a rug, two cushions and a
footstool, beneath the burden of which she had been staggering across
the lawn like a small pack mule. “Make you nice and comfortable, and
then you can get a nice nap. I can see you’re all tired out.”
“That’s awfully good of you, Claire. But you shouldn’t have bothered.”
Claire Lippett, daughter of Willoughby Braddock’s autocratic housekeeper
and cook and maid-of-all-work at San Rafael, was a survivor of the
Midways epoch. She had entered the Derrick household at the age of
twelve, her duties at that time being vague and leaving her plenty of
leisure for surreptitious bird’s-nesting with Kay, then thirteen. On her
eighteenth birthday she had been promoted to the post of Kay’s personal
maid, and from that moment may be said formally to have taken charge.
The Lippett motto was Fidelity, and not even the famous financial crash
had been able to dislodge this worthy daughter of the clan. Resolutely
following Kay into exile, she had become, as stated, Mr. Wrenn’s cook.
And, as Mr. Braddock had justly remarked, a very bad cook too.
“You oughtn’t to go getting yourself all tired, Miss Kay. You ought to
be sitting at your ease.”
“Well, so I am,” said Kay.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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