Samantha among the Brethren — Volume 2Holley, Marietta
General
Samantha among the Brethren — Volume 2
Holley, Marietta
Methodism -- Humor; Women in church work -- Methodist church -- Humor; Women's rights -- Humor
Submit is a good creeter, and she wouldn't have put that burden on me on
such a time for nothin', not if she had known my tribulations; but she
didn't, and I felt that one trial more wouldn't, as the poet hath well
said, "either make or break me."
So I went to huntin' for the seeds. Wall, it wuz a good half-hour before
I could find 'em, for of course it wuz natural nater, accordin' to the
total deprivity of things, that I should find 'em in the bottom of the
last bag of seeds that I overhauled.
But Submit had been disappointed, and I didn't want to make her burdens
any heavier, so I sent her the sturchien seeds.
But it wuz a trial I do admit to look over more than forty bags of
garden and flower seeds in such a time as that. But I sent 'em. I sent
Submit the sturchien seeds, and then I laid to work again fast as I
possibly could.
But I sez to the author of "Peaceful Repose," I sez to her, sez I:
"I feel bad to think I hain't gettin' no time to hear you rehearse your
lecture, but you can see jest how it is; you see I hain't had a minute's
time today. Mebby I will get a few minutes' time before night; I will
try to," sez I.
"Oh," sez she, "it hain't no matter about that; I--I--I somehow--I don't
feel like rehearsin' it as it was." Sez she, "I guess I shall make some
changes in it before I rehearse it agin."
Sez I, "You lay out to make a more mean thing of it, more megum."
"Yes," sez she, in faint axents, "I am a-thinkin' of it."
[Illustration: "AS I STARTED FOR THE BUTTERY."]
"Wall," sez I cheerfully, as I started for the buttery with a pile of
cups in one hand, the castor and pickle dish in the other, and a pile of
napkins under my arm, "I believe I shall like it as well again if you
do, any way," sez I, as I kicked away the cat that wuz a-clawin' my
dress, and opened the door with my foot, both hands bein' full.
"Any way, there will be as much agin truth in it."
Wall, I went to work voyalently, and in two hours' time I had got my
work quelled down some. But I had to strain nearly every nerve in the
effort.
And I am afraid I didn't use the colporter just exactly right, who come
when I wuz right in the midst of puttin' the ingregiences into my tea
cakes. I didn't enter so deep into the argument about the Revised
New Testament as I should in easier and calmer times. I conversed
considerable, I argued some with him, but I didn't get so engaged as
mebby I had ort to. He acted disappointed, and he didn't stay and talk
more'n an hour and three quarters.
He generally spends half a day with us. He is a master hand to talk;
he'll make your brain fairly spin round he talks so fast and handles
such large, curius words. He talked every minute, only when I wuz
a-answerin' his questions.
[Illustration: "THERE WUZ SOMETHIN' WRONG ABOUT 'EM."]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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