"Oh, yes, Samantha, that in itself will be worth double the price of admission." "Then you expect to ask pay, Josiah?" "Certainly, why not? Do they not ask pay at the twin celebration? "But you spoke of inventions; I shall let the rest of the Allens show off. Lots of 'em have invented things, but of course my inventions will rank number one. There is my button on the suller door I cut it out of an old boot leg. Who ever hearn of a leather button before, and it works well if you don't want to fasten the door tight. Then there is that self actin' hen-coop of mine that lets a stick fall down and shuts the door when the hen walks up the ladder." "But no hen has ever clim the ladder yet, Josiah." "No, perhaps they hain't yet, but I'm expectin' to see 'em every day, 'tennyrate paint that coop a bright red and yaller and it will attract a crowd. "And then there is that travelin' rat trap of brother Henzy's, you know his grandmother wuz an Allen, I shall mayhap let him appear. And then there is all my farmin' implements and the rest of the Allen's I lay out to be just to all, and let 'em all come and show off in my Agricultural show. "But of course there has got to be a head to it; Napoleon wuz the head of the other Purchase, and I'm the head of this. In short, Samantha, I am _It_." Oh, how full of pride and vain glory he wuz, and I knowed such feelin's would have to be brung down for his spiritual good. I realized it as he went on, "I tell you, Napoleon and I would have made a span, Samantha, if he could been spared till now." Oh how shamed I wuz to hear such talk, but I sot demute for reasons named, and he sez agin, "I thought mebby you would want to be one of the attractions of the Pike, Samantha; I lay out to have livin' statutes adornin' the side of the lane leadin' up from the beaver medder to the horse trough." "Livin' statutes!" sez I, coldly, "I don't know what you mean by them." [Illustration] "Why, I thought for a few cents I could git a lot of children and old folks to be white-washed for a day or two and pose as statutes. It would be a new thing and a crackin' good idee, for livin' statutes that can wink, and bow, and talk, and walk round some, I don't believe wuz ever hearn on before." "No indeed," sez I, "but I can tell you, Josiah Allen, I've played many strange parts in the role of life at your request, but I tell you once for all I shall never, _never_ be whitewashed and set up for a statute, you can set your mind to rest on that to once." "Mebby you'd ruther be a Historical Tabloo, Samantha; I lay out to have beautiful ones, and I thought I wouldn't confine myself to the States, but would branch out and have the foreign nations represented figuratively.