I remembered the widder's mite, how he had interpreted that scriptural
incident about that noble female--as interpreters will, to suit their
own idees as males--and how I had argued with him in vain on the mite,
and his onscriptural and equinomical views.
I felt that he had a strong and powerful case; and though I could not
brook the idee of his goin', still I thought that I must be as wise as a
serpent and as harmless as a turkle-dove, to git the victory over him.
He see by the fluckuations of color on my usially calm cheek, and by the
pensive and thoughtful look in my two gray orbs, that I felt the
strength and powerfulness of his cause.
And as he mused, he begun in joyous and triumphant axents to bring up
before me some of his latest and most striking instances of equinomical
tightness.
Sez he, "Do you remember the case of Sy Biddlecomb, and them green
pumpkins of mine, how I--" But I interrupted his almost fervid
eloquence, and sez I, with my right hand extended in a real eloquent
wave,
"Pause, Josiah Allen, and less consider and weigh things in the
balances. Go not too fast, less disapintment attend your efforts, and
mortification wrops you in its mantilly.
"Your equinomical ways, Josiah Allen," sez I, "it seems to me ort to
rize you up above every other man on the face of the globe, and make a
lion of you of the first magnitude, even a roarin' African lion, as it
were."
He looked proud and happy, and I proceeded.
"But pause for one moment," sez I, in tender, cautious axents, "and
think of the power, the tremendious econimy of the males you are
a-tryin' to emulate and outdo. Think of how they have dealt with the
cause of wimmen's liberty for the past few years, and tremble. How dast
you, one weak man, though highly versed in the ways of equinomical
tightness--how dast you to try and set up and be anybody amid that
host?"
He looked skairt. He see what he wuz a-doin' plainer than he had seen
it, and I went on:
"Think of that big Methodist Conference in New York a few years ago that
Casper Keeler told us about--think how equinomical they wuz with their
dealin's with wimmen on that occasion, and ever sence.
"The wimmen full of good doin's and alms deeds, who make up two thirds
of the church, who raise the minister's salary, run the missionary and
temperance societies, teach the Sabbath schools, etc., etc., etc.--
"Who give the best of their lives and thoughts to the meetin'-house from
the time they sell button-hole bokays at church fairs in pantalettes,
till they hand in their widder's mite with tremblin' fingers wrinkled
with age--think of this econimy in not givin' in, not givin' a mite of
justice and right to the hull caboodle of such wimmen throughout the
length and breadth of the country, and then think where would your very
closest and tightest counsel of econimy stand by the side of this
econimy of right, and manliness, and honor, and common sense."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account