Sandra Belloni (originally Emilia in England) — CompleteMeredith, George
General
Sandra Belloni (originally Emilia in England) — Complete
Meredith, George
English fiction -- 19th century
Cornelia alone sounded near the keynote. Since the night that she had
met him in the passage, and the next morning when Mrs. Chump had raised
the hubbub about her loss, Cornelia's thoughts had been troubled by some
haunting spectral relationship with money. It had helped to make her
reckless in granting interviews to Purcell Barrett. “If we are poor, I
am free;” and that she might then give herself to whomever she pleased,
was her logical deduction. The exposure at Besworth, and the partial
confirmation of her suspicions, were not without their secret comfort
to her. In the carriage, coming home, Wilfrid had touched her hand
by chance, and pressed it with good heart. She went to the library,
imagining that if he wished to see her he would appear, and by exposing
his own weakness learn to excuse hers. She was right in her guess;
Wilfrid came. He came sauntering into the room with “Ah! you here?”
Cornelia consented to play into his hypocrisy. “Yes, I generally think
better here,” she replied.
“And what has this pretty head got to do with thinking?”
“Not much, I suppose, my lord,” she replied, affecting nobly to
acknowledge the weakness of the female creature.
Wilfrid kissed her with an unaccustomed fervour. This delicate mumming
was to his taste. It was yet more so when she spoke playfully to him of
his going soon to be a married man. He could answer to that in a smiling
negative, playing round the question, until she perceived that he really
desired to have his feeling for the odd dark girl who had recently shot
across their horizon touched, if only it were led to by the muffled ways
of innuendo.
As a dog, that cannot ask you verbally to scratch his head, but wishes
it, will again and again thrust his head into your hand, petitioning
mutely that affection may divine him, so:--but we deal with a
sentimentalist, and the simile is too gross to be exact. For no
sooner was Wilfrid's head scratched, than the operation stuck him as
humiliating; in other words, the moment he felt his sisters fingers
in the ticklish part, he flew to another theme, then returned, and so
backward and forward--mystifying her not slightly, and making her think,
“Then he has no heart.” She by no means intended to encourage love for
Emilia, but she hoped for his sake, that the sentiment he had indulged
was sincere. By-and-by he said, that though he had no particular
affection for Lady Charlotte, he should probably marry her.
“Without loving her, Wilfrid? It is unfair to her; it is unfair to
yourself.”
Wilfrid understood perfectly who it was for whom she pleaded thus
vehemently. He let her continue: and when she had dwelt on the horrors
of marriages without love, and the supreme duty of espousing one who has
our 'heart's loyalty,' he said, “You may be right. A man must not play
with a girl. He must consider that he owes a duty to one who is more
dependent;”--implying that a woman s duty was distinct and different in
such a case.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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