Men -- Russia -- Fiction; Russia -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction
There was dead silence in the room. Novikoff smiled a strange, sickly
smile and rubbed his hands. From his trembling lips there issued a
faint cry. Sanine stood over him, looking straight into his eyes. The
wrinkled corners of his mouth showed suppressed anger.
“Well, why don’t you speak?” he asked.
Novikoff looked up for a moment, but instantly avoided the other’s
glance, his features being still distorted by a vacuous smile.
“Lida has just gone through a terrible ordeal,” said Sanine in a low
voice, as if soliloquising. If I had not chanced to overtake her, she
would not be living now, and what yesterday was a healthful, handsome
girl would now be lying in the river-mud, a bloated corpse, devoured by
crabs. The question is not one of her death—we must each of us die some
day—yet how sad to think that with her all the brightness and joy
created for others by her personality would also have perished. Of
course, Lida is not the only one in all the world; but, my God! if
there were no girlish loveliness left, it would be as sad and gloomy as
the grave.
“For my part, I am eager to commit murder when I see a poor girl
brought to ruin in this senseless way. Personally, it is a matter of
utter indifference to me whether you marry Lida or go to the devil, but
I must tell you that you are an idiot. If you had got one sound idea in
your head, would you worry yourself and others so much merely because a
young woman, free to pick and choose, had become the mistress of a man
who was unworthy of her, and by following her sexual impulse had
achieved her own complete development? Nor are you the only idiot, let
me tell you. There are millions of your sort who make life into a
prison, without sunshine or warmth! How often have you given rein to
your lust in company with some harlot, the sharer of your sordid
debauch? In Lida’s case it was passion, the poetry of youth, and
strength, and beauty. By what right, then, do you shrink from her, you
that call yourself an intelligent, sensible man? What has her past to
do with you? Is she less beautiful? Or less fitted for loving, or for
being loved? Is it that you yourself wanted to be the first to possess
her? Now then, speak!”
“You know very well that it is not that!” said Novikoff, as his lips
trembled.
“Ah! yes, but it is!” cried Sanine. “What else could it be, pray?”
Novikoff was silent. All was darkness within his soul, yet, as a
distant ray of light through the gloom there came the thought of pardon
and self-sacrifice.
Sanine, watching him, seemed to read what was passing through his mind.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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