Satiro-Mastix; or, the Vntrussing of the Humorous PoetDekker, Thomas
General
Satiro-Mastix; or, the Vntrussing of the Humorous Poet
Dekker, Thomas
Jonson, Ben, 1573?-1637
|910| _Ter._ I dare and will by that ioynt holy oath,
Which she and I swore to the booke of heauen.
This very day when the surueying Sunne,
Riz like a witnes to her faith and mine,
By all the loyalty that subiects owe
|915| To Maiesty, by that, by this, by both,
I sweare to make a double guarded oath,
This night vntainted by the touch of man,
She shall a Virgin come.
_Kin._ To Court? _Ter._ To Court.
|920| I know I tooke a woman to my wife,
And I know women to be earthly Moones,
That neuer shine till night, I know they change
Their Orbes (their husbands) and in sickish hearts,
Steale to their sweete Endimions, to be cur’d
|925| With better Phisicke, sweeter dyet drinkes,
Then home can minister: all this I know
Yet know not all, but giue me leaue O King,
To boast of mine, and saie that I know none;
I haue a woman but not such a one.
|930| _Kin._ Why, she’s confirmed in thee; I now approoue her,
If constant in thy thoughts who then can mooue her?
_Enter_ Sir Quintilian.
_Sir qui._ Wilt please your Highnes take your place within,
The Ladies attend the Table.
|935| _Kin._ I goe good Knight; Wat thy oath.
_Ter._ My Lord,
My oath’s my honour, my honour is my life,
My oath is constant, so I hope my wife.
_Exeunt._
_Enter_ Horace _in his true attyre_, Asinius _bearing his Cloake_.
|940| _Asi._ If you flye out Ningle, heer’s your Cloake; I thinke it
raines too.
_Ho._ Hide my shoulders in’t.
_Asi._ Troth so th’adst neede, for now thou art in thy Pee and Kue;
thou hast such a villanous broad backe, that I warrant |945| th’art
able to beare away any mans iestes in England.
_Hor._ It’s well Sir, I ha strength to beare yours mee thinkes; fore
God you are growne a piece of a Critist, since you fell into my hands:
ah little roague, your wit has pickt vp her crums prettie and well.
|950| _Asi._ Yes faith, I finde my wit a the mending hand Ningle; troth
I doe not thinke but to proceede Poetaster next Commencement, if I haue
my grace perfectlie: euerie one that confer with me now, stop their
nose in merriment, and sweare I smell somewhat of Horace; one calles me
Horaces Ape, another |955| Horaces Beagle, and such Poeticall names it
passes. I was but at Barbers last day, and when he was rencing my face,
did but crie out, fellow thou makst me _Conniue_ too long, & sayes he,
Master _Asinius Bubo_, you haue eene Horaces wordes as right as if he
had spit them into your mouth.
|960| _Hor._ Well, away deare Asinius, deliuer this letter to the young
Gallant _Druso_, he that fell so strongly in loue with mee yesternight.
_Asin._ It’s a sweete Muske-cod, a pure spic’d-gull; by this feather I
pittie his _Ingenuities_; but hast writ all this since Ningle? I know
|965| thou hast a good running head and thou listest.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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