Satiro-Mastix; or, the Vntrussing of the Humorous PoetDekker, Thomas
General
Satiro-Mastix; or, the Vntrussing of the Humorous Poet
Dekker, Thomas
Jonson, Ben, 1573?-1637
_Min._ To mee? why Master Captaine, you know that I haue my |1230|
choise of three or foure payre of Knights, and therefore haue small
reason to flye out I know not how in a man of war.
_Tuc._ A man a warre? come thou knowst not what a worshipfull focation
tis to be a Captaines wife: three or four payre of Knights? why dost
heare Ioane-a-bedlam, Ile enter into bond to |1235| be dub’d by what
day thou wilt, when the next action is layde vpon me, thou shalt be
Ladified.
_Min._ You know I am offered that by halfe a dozen.
_Tuc._ Thou shalt little Miniuer, thou shalt, Ile ha this frock turn’d
into a foote-cloth; and thou shalt be carted, drawne I |1240| meane,
Coacht, Coacht, thou shalt ryde Iigga-Iogge; a Hood shall flap vp and
downe heere, and this shipskin-cap shall be put off.
_Mini._ Nay perdie, Ile put off my cap for no mans pleasure.
_Tuc._ Wut thou be proude little Lucifer? well, thou shalt goe
|1245| how thou wilt Maide-marian; come, busse thy little Anthony
now, now, my cleane Cleopatria; so, so, goe thy waies Alexis
secrets, th’ast a breath as sweet as the Rose, that growes by the
Beare-garden, as sweete as the proud’st heade a Garlicke in England:
come, wut march in, to the Gentle folkes?
|1250| _Mini._ Nay trulie Captaine you shall be my leader.
_Tuc._ I say Mary Ambree, thou shalt march formost,
Because Ile marke how broad th’art in the heeles.
_Mini._ Perdie, I will be set ath last for this time.
_Tuc._ Why then come, we’ll walke arme in arme,
|1255| As tho we were leading one another to Newgate.
_Enter_ Blunt, Crispinus, _and_ Demetrius, _with papers, laughing._
_Cri._ Mine’s of a fashion, cut out quite from yours.
_Dem._ Mine has the sharpest tooth, yonder he is.
_Blu._ Captaine Tucca.
_All hold vp papers._
|1260| _Tuc._ How now? I cannot stand to read supplications now.
_Cris._ They’re bitter Epigrams compos’d on you
By Horace.
_Dem._ And disperst amongst the gallants
In seuerall coppies, by Asinius Bubo.
|1265| _Tuc._ By that liue Eele? read, _Lege Legito_, read thou Iacke.
_Blu._ _Tucca’s growne monstrous, how? rich? that I feare,
He’s to be seene for money euery where._
_Tuc._ Why true, shall not I get in my debts, nay and the roague write
no better I care not, farewell blacke Iacke farewell.
|1270| _Cri._ But Captaine heer’s a nettle.
_Tuc._ Sting me, doe.
_Cri._ _Tucca’s exceeding tall and yet not hye,
He fights with skill, but does most vilye lye._
_Tuc._ Right, for heere I lye now, open, open, to make my |1275|
aduersarie come on; and then Sir, heere am I in’s bosome: nay and this
be the worst, I shal hug the poore honest face-maker, Ile loue the
little Atheist, when he writes after my commendation, another whip?
come yerke me.
_Dem._ _Tucca will bite, how? growne Satiricall,
|1280| No, he bites tables, for he feedes on all._
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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