Satiro-Mastix; or, the Vntrussing of the Humorous PoetDekker, Thomas
General
Satiro-Mastix; or, the Vntrussing of the Humorous Poet
Dekker, Thomas
Jonson, Ben, 1573?-1637
_Tuc._ Nay I smell what breath is to come from thee, thy answer is,
that there’s no faith to be helde with Heritickes & Infidels, and
therfore thou swear’st anie thing: but come, lend mee thy hand, thou
and I hence forth will bee _Alexander_ and _Lodwicke_, the |1710|
Gemini: sworne brothers, thou shalt be _Perithous_ and Tucca _Theseus_;
but Ile leaue thee i’th lurch, when thou mak’st thy voiage into hell:
till then, T_hine-assuredly_.
_Hor._ With all my soule deare Capten.
_Tuc._ Thou’lt shoote thy quilles at mee, when my terrible |1715|
backe’s turn’d for all this, wilt not Porcupine? and bring me & my
Heliconistes into thy Dialogues to make vs talke madlie wut not Lucian?
_Hor._ Capten, if I doe----
_Tuc._ Nay and thou dost, hornes of Lucifer, the _Parcell-Poets_ |1720|
shall Sue thy wrangling Muse, in the Court of Pernassus, and neuer
leaue hunting her, till she pleade in _Forma Pauperis_: but I hope
th’ast more grace: come: friendes, clap handes, tis a bargaine; amiable
Bubo, thy fist must walke too: so, I loue thee, now I see th’art a
little Hercules, and wilt fight; Ile Sticke thee |1725| now in my
companie like a sprig of Rosemary.
_Enter_ Sir Rees ap Vaughan _and_ Peter Flash.
_Fla._ Draw Sir Rees he’s yonder, shall I vpon him?
_Sir Vau._ Vpon him? goe too, goe too Peter Salamander; holde, in Gods
name holde; I will kill him to his face, because I meane he |1730|
shall answer for it; being an eye-witnes; one vrde Capten Tucky.
_Tuc._ Ile giue thee ten thousand words and thou wilt, my little Thomas
Thomasius.
_Sir Vau._ By Sesu, tis best you giue good vrdes too, least I beate out
your tongue, and make your vrde nere to bee taken |1735| more; doe you
heare, fiue pounds, fiue pounds Tucky.
_Tuc._ Thou shalt ha fiue, and fiue, and fiue, and thou wantst money my
Iob.
_Sir Vau._ Leaue your fetches and your fegaries, you tough
leather-Ierkins; leaue your quandaries, and trickes, and draw vpon
|1740| me y’ are best: you conny-catch Widdow _Miniuer-caps_ for fiue
pounds, and say tis for me to cry Mum, and make mee run vp and downe in
dishonors, and discredites; is ’t not true, you winke-a-pipes rascall?
is not true?
_Tuc._ Right, true, guilty, I remember’t now; for when I spake |1745|
a good word to the Widdow for thee my young Sampson----
_Sir Vau._ For fiue pounds you cheating scab, for 5. pounds, not for me.
_Tuc._ For thee ô Cæsar, for thee I tooke vp fiue pounds in golde, that
lay in her lap, & said Ide giue it thee as a token |1750| from her: I
did it but to smell out how she stood affected to thee, to feele her;
I, and I know what she said, I know how I carried away the golde.
_Sir Vau._ By Sesu, I ha not the mercy to fall vpon him now: M. Tucky,
did widdow Miniuers part quietly from her golde, |1755| because you
lyed, and said it was for me?
_Tuc._ Quietly, in peace, without grumbling; made no noise, I know how
I tempted her in thy behalfe; my little Trangdo.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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