Great Britain -- Politics and government -- 20th century -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Politicians -- Fiction
"I shan't, however, do anything more to-day," Gilly announced, rising
and putting on his hat. "My nerves are somewhat over-stimulated. A walk
in the park, a game of bridge, and a quiet little dinner are indicated.
You'll attend to anything that turns up, won't you, old chap?"
Slowly and gradually Andy Hayes was growing not only into his strength
but also into the consciousness of it. He was measuring his
powers--slowly, suspiciously, distrustfully. His common sense refused to
ignore what he had done and was doing, but his modesty ever declined to
go a step beyond the facts. All through his life this characteristic
abode with him--a sort of surprise that the simple qualities he
recognised in himself should stand him in such good stead, combined with
an unwillingness rashly to pledge their efficacy in the greater labours
of the future. Thus it came about that he was, so to say, a day behind
the world's estimate in his estimate of himself. When the people about
him were already sure, he was gradually reaching confidence--never the
imperious self-confidence of commanding genius, which makes no question
but that the future will be as obedient to its sway as the past, but a
very sober trust in a proved ability, a trust based on no inner instinct
of power, but solely on the plain experience that hitherto he had shown
himself equal to the business which came his way--equal to it if he
worked very hard at it, took it seriously, and gave all he had to give
to it. The degree of self-confidence thus achieved was never sufficient
to make him seek adventures; by slow growth it became enough to prevent
him from turning his back on any task, however heavy, which the course
of his life and the judgment of his fellows laid upon him. So step by
step he moved on in his development and in his knowledge of it. He
recognised now that it would have been a pity to pass his life as a
butcher in Meriton--that it would have been waste of material. But he
was still quite content to regard as a sufficient occupation, and
triumph, of that life the building-up of Gilbert Foot and Co.'s
educational publishing connection; and he was still surprised to be
reminded that he had contributed anything more than hard work to that
task, that it owed to him even the smallest scintilla of original
suggestion. Still there it was. Perhaps he would never do a thing like
that again. Very likely not. Still he had done it once. It passed from
the impossibles to the possibles--a possible under strict and
distrustful observation, but a possible that should be put to the proof.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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