"Shoo's war nor a guinea pig, wi her ivverlastin' 'wee wee,'" sed Billy, an' he wor shuttin' th' box up agean but shoo coom up an' tuk it aght an' awm blowed if it wornt a shirt after all. After that we decided to goa to th' Exhibition an' spend th' furst day thear--but as Billy wor detarmined net to walk an' wod call at ivvery shop'at had one o' Bass's or Alsop's cards ith' winder it tuk us wol after dinnertime to get thear, but it wornt after th' time'at we could do wi a dinner for all that, but ther wor soa mich to see wol aitin seem'd ommost aght o' th' question--even Billy, although he wor walkin up an daan oppen maath seemed to ha forgetten to grow dry. They manage theas things better i' France; (aw fancy aw've heeard that befoor) but although aw know awst nivver be able to do justice to it, yet aw think aw owt to give yo as gooid an' accaant as aw can. Well then to begin wi; we'll goa back a little bit an' mak a fair start. In a strange country mooast things luk strange an' ith' walk we'd had we saw a deeal at capt us, but nowt moor surprisin' nor th' amaant o' ugly wimmen. We'd come prepared to be dazzled wi female luvliness an' grand dresses but ther wor nowt at sooart to see. Th' mooast on em wor dark skinned--sharp een'd, podgy-bodied, dowdy-donned crayturs'at lukt varry mich like wesherwimmen aght o' wark. Th' chaps wor better lukkin' bi th' hauf, but Billy sed he thowt they'd luk better if they'd stop off suppin' red ink an' get some gooid ale an' beef onto ther booans. But ther's one thing'at aw dooant believe ony Frenchman can do, an' that is, slouch along th' street wi his hands in his pockets like a thorough-bred Yorksherman! Even them at's huggin looads o' boxes an' hampers o' ther rig, (sich looads as a Yorksher chap ud stand an' luk at wol somdy went an' fotched a horse an' cart,) trip away as if they'd somewhear to goa, an' as if ther feet had been created to carry ther body an' net as if it wor th' body at had been intended to trail th' feet after it. An' yet someha or other, nubdy seemed to be in a hurry--th' street cars are run thear to save th' trouble o' walkin', but ther seems to be noa idea o' savin time. If a chap wants to ride he nivver thinks to wait wol a car comes up to him, he walks on till he ovvertaks one. Th' cabs are a little bit better as regards speed but aw could'nt help thinkin' at if they'd give th' horses moor oats an' less whip it ud be better for all sides. Aw nivver i' mi life heeard owt like th' whipcrackin' at wor to be heeard ith' busy streets, it reminded me o' nowt soa mich as th' fourth o' July in America; ivvery driver wor alike an' ther whips went wi as mich regilarity as a wayver's pickin' stick. To us it wor a newsance an' for th' chaps it must ha been hard wark but th' horses did'nt seem to tak ony nooatice--but if they give'em plenty o' whip aw dooant think they oft kill'em wi wark, for we passed monny a team o' six