He saw suddenly--with terrible clarity--that to be a Winner was to be
absolutely nothing. Like being the best flea, among all the fleas on a
single dog.
What was Anvhar after all? An ice-locked planet, inhabited by a few
million human fleas, unknown and unconsidered by the rest of the galaxy.
There was nothing here worth fighting for, the wars after the Breakdown
had left them untouched. The Anvharian had always taken pride in
this--as if being so unimportant that no one else even wanted to come
near you, could possibly be a source of pride. All the worlds of man
grew, fought, won, lost, changed. Only on Anvhar did life repeat its
sameness endlessly, like a loop of tape in a player....
Brion's eyes were moist, he blinked. _Tears!!_ Realization of this
incredible fact wiped the maudlin pity from his mind and replaced it
with fear. Had his mind snapped in the strain of the last match? These
thoughts weren't his. Self-pity hadn't made him a Winner--why was he
feeling it now? Anvhar was his universe--how could he even imagine it
as a tag-end planet at the outer limb of creation? What had come over
him and induced this inverse thinking.
As he thought the question, the answer appeared at the same instant.
Winner Ihjel. The fat man with the strange pronouncements and probing
questions. Had he cast a spell like some sorcerer--or the devil in
"Faust"? No, that was pure nonsense. But he had done something. Perhaps
planted a suggestion when Brion's resistance was low. Or used subliminal
vocalization like the villain in "Cerebrus Chained." Brion could find no
adequate reason on which to base his suspicions. But he knew that Ihjel
was responsible.
He whistled at the sound-switch next to his pillow and the repaired
communicator came to life. The duty nurse appeared in the small screen.
"The man who was here today," Brion said, "Winner Ihjel, do you know
where he is? I must contact him."
For some reason this flustered her professional calm. The nurse started
to answer, excused herself, and blanked the screen. When it lit again a
man in Guard's uniform had taken her place.
"You made an inquiry," the Guard said, "about Winner Ihjel. We are
holding him here in the hospital following the disgraceful way in which
he broke into your room."
"I have no charges to make. Will you ask him to come and see me at
once?"
The Guard controlled his shock. "I'm sorry, Winner--I don't see how we
can. Dr. Caulry left specific orders that you were not to be--"
"The doctor has no control over my personal life," Brion snapped at him.
"I'm not infectious, or ill with anything more than extreme fatigue. I
want to see that man. At once."
The Guard took a deep breath, and made a quick decision. "He is on the
way up now," he said, and rung off.
* * * * *
"What did you do to me?" Brion asked as soon as Ihjel had entered and
they were alone. "You won't deny that you have put alien thoughts in my
head?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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