As the flow of sensation died away, Brion realized he was sprawled back
weakly on his pillows, soaked with sweat, washed with the memory of the
raw emotion. Across from him Ihjel sat with his face bowed into his
hands. When he lifted his head Brion saw within his eyes a shadow of the
blackness he had just experienced.
"Death," Brion said. "That terrible feeling of death. It wasn't just the
people of Dis who would die. It was something more personal."
"Myself," Ihjel said, and behind this simple word were the repeated
echoes of night that Brion had been made aware of with his newly
recognized ability. "My own death, not too far away. This is the
wonderfully terrible price you must pay for your talent. _Angst_ is an
inescapable part of empathy. It is a part of the whole unknown field of
psi phenomena that seems to be independent of time. Death is so
traumatic and final that it reverberates back along the time line. The
closer I get, the more aware of it I am. There is no exact feeling of
date, just a rough location in time. That is the horror of it. I _know_
I will die soon after I get to Dis--and long before the work there is
finished. I know the job to be done there, and I know the men who have
already failed at it. I also know you are the only person who can
possibly complete the work I have started. Do you agree now? Will you
come with me?"
"Yes, of course," Brion said. "I'll go with you."
IV
"I've never seen anyone quite as angry as that doctor," Brion said.
"Can't blame him," Ihjel shifted his immense weight and grunted from the
console, where he was having a coded conversation with the ship's brain.
He hit the keys quickly, and read the answer from the screen. "You took
away his medical moment of glory. How many times in his life will he
have a chance to nurse back to rugged smiling health the triumphantly
exhausted Winner of the Twenties?"
"Not many, I imagine. The wonder of it is how you managed to convince
him that you and the ship here could take care of me as well as his
hospital."
"I could never convince him of that," Ihjel said. "But I and the
Cultural Relationships Foundation have some powerful friends on Anvhar.
I'm forced to admit I brought a little pressure to bear." He leaned back
and read the course tape as it streamed out of the printer. "We have a
little time to spare, but I would rather spend it waiting at the other
end. We'll blast as soon as I have you tied down in a stasis field."
The completeness of the stasis field leaves no impression on the body or
mind. In it there is no weight, no pressure, no pain--no sensation of
any kind. Except for a stasis of very long duration, there is no
sensation of time. To Brion's consciousness, Ihjel flipped the switch
off with a continuation of the same motion that had turned it on. The
ship was unchanged, only outside of the port was the red-shot blankness
of jump space.
"How do you feel?" Ihjel asked.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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