Seventeen Years Among the Sea Dyaks of Borneo: A Record of Intimate Association with the Natives of the Bornean JunglesGomes, Edwin Herbert
History
Seventeen Years Among the Sea Dyaks of Borneo: A Record of Intimate Association with the Natives of the Bornean Jungles
Gomes, Edwin Herbert
Iban (Bornean people); Sarawak (Malaysia) -- Description and travel
The morals of the Dyak from an Eastern point of view are good. There is
no law to punish immorality between unmarried people. The parents do not
seem to be strict, and it is considered no disgrace for a girl to be on
terms of intimacy with the youths of her fancy until she has made her
final choice. It is supposed that every young Dyak woman will eventually
marry, so her duty is plainly to choose a husband in her youth from
among the many men she knows. And yet, for all this, I should say that
promiscuous immorality is unknown. It is true that very often a girl is
with child before her marriage, but from the Dyak point of view this is
no disgrace if the father acknowledges the child and marries the woman.
The greatest desire of the Dyak is to become a parent, to be known as
father or mother of So-and-so. They drop their own names after the birth
of a child. A young couple in love have no opportunities of private
meetings excepting at night, and the only place is the loft where the
young lady sleeps. The suitor pays his visit, therefore, when the rest of
the family are asleep, and she gets up from her bed and receives him. Two
or three hours may be spent in her company before he leaves her, or if he
should be one whom she is not willing to accept as a husband, she soon
gives him his dismissal. If acceptable, the young man may be admitted to
such close intimacy as though they were already married. The reason is
to ascertain the certainty of progeny. On his departure he leaves with
the young lady some ornament or article of his attire, as a pledge of his
sincerity and good faith. On the first signs of pregnancy the marriage
ceremony takes place, and they are man and wife.
Divorce is very uncommon after the birth of a child, but where there are
no children, for such reasons as incompatibility of temper or idleness,
divorce is obtainable by either husband or wife by paying a small fine.
The women as a rule are faithful to their husbands, especially when they
have children, and adultery is very uncommon when there is a family.
The Dyak law respecting adultery is peculiar and worthy of notice. If a
woman commit adultery with a married man, his wife may make a complaint
to the headman of the house, and receive a fine from the guilty woman;
or, if she prefer it, she may waylay the guilty woman and thrash her; but
if she do so, she must forgo one-half of the fine otherwise due to her.
In the eyes of the Dyak the woman is alone to blame in a case like this.
“She knew,” they say, “the man has a wife of his own; she had no business
to entice him away from her.” If a married man commits adultery with an
unmarried woman the procedure is similar. The wife of the man may punish
the girl, but no one punishes the man. The whole blame, according to Dyak
ideas, falls on the woman for tempting the man.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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