She Stoops to Conquer; Or, The Mistakes of a Night: A ComedyGoldsmith, Oliver
General
She Stoops to Conquer; Or, The Mistakes of a Night: A Comedy
Goldsmith, Oliver
Comedy plays
MISS HARDCASTLE. Yes: but upon conditions. For if you should find him
less impudent, and I more presuming--if you find him more respectful,
and I more importunate--I don’t know--the fellow is well enough for a
man--Certainly, we don’t meet many such at a horse-race in the country.
HARDCASTLE. If we should find him so----But that’s impossible. The
first appearance has done my business. I’m seldom deceived in that.
MISS HARDCASTLE. And yet there may be many good qualities under that
first appearance.
HARDCASTLE. Ay, when a girl finds a fellow’s outside to her taste, she
then sets about guessing the rest of his furniture. With her, a smooth
face stands for good sense, and a genteel figure for every virtue.
MISS HARDCASTLE. I hope, sir, a conversation begun with a compliment
to my good sense, won’t end with a sneer at my understanding?
HARDCASTLE. Pardon me, Kate. But if young Mr. Brazen can find the art
of reconciling contradictions, he may please us both, perhaps.
MISS HARDCASTLE. And as one of us must be mistaken, what if we go to
make further discoveries?
HARDCASTLE. Agreed. But depend on’t I’m in the right.
MISS HARDCASTLE. And depend on’t I’m not much in the wrong.
[Exeunt.]
Enter Tony, running in with a casket.
TONY. Ecod! I have got them. Here they are. My cousin Con’s
necklaces, bobs and all. My mother shan’t cheat the poor souls out of
their fortin neither. O! my genus, is that you?
Enter HASTINGS.
HASTINGS. My dear friend, how have you managed with your mother? I
hope you have amused her with pretending love for your cousin, and that
you are willing to be reconciled at last? Our horses will be refreshed
in a short time, and we shall soon be ready to set off.
TONY. And here’s something to bear your charges by the way (giving the
casket); your sweetheart’s jewels. Keep them: and hang those, I say,
that would rob you of one of them.
HASTINGS. But how have you procured them from your mother?
TONY. Ask me no questions, and I’ll tell you no fibs. I procured them
by the rule of thumb. If I had not a key to every drawer in mother’s
bureau, how could I go to the alehouse so often as I do? An honest man
may rob himself of his own at any time.
HASTINGS. Thousands do it every day. But to be plain with you; Miss
Neville is endeavouring to procure them from her aunt this very
instant. If she succeeds, it will be the most delicate way at least of
obtaining them.
TONY. Well, keep them, till you know how it will be. But I know how
it will be well enough; she’d as soon part with the only sound tooth in
her head.
HASTINGS. But I dread the effects of her resentment, when she finds
she has lost them.
TONY. Never you mind her resentment, leave ME to manage that. I
don’t value her resentment the bounce of a cracker. Zounds! here they
are. Morrice! Prance! [Exit HASTINGS.]
Enter MRS. HARDCASTLE and MISS NEVILLE.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account