She Stoops to Conquer; Or, The Mistakes of a Night: A ComedyGoldsmith, Oliver
General
She Stoops to Conquer; Or, The Mistakes of a Night: A Comedy
Goldsmith, Oliver
Comedy plays
HARDCASTLE. Sure, Dorothy, you have not lost your wits? So far from
home, when you are within forty yards of your own door! (To him.)
This is one of your old tricks, you graceless rogue, you. (To her.)
Don’t you know the gate, and the mulberry-tree; and don’t you remember
the horse-pond, my dear?
MRS. HARDCASTLE. Yes, I shall remember the horse-pond as long as I
live; I have caught my death in it. (To TONY.) And it is to you, you
graceless varlet, I owe all this? I’ll teach you to abuse your mother,
I will.
TONY. Ecod, mother, all the parish says you have spoiled me, and so
you may take the fruits on’t.
MRS. HARDCASTLE. I’ll spoil you, I will. [Follows him off the stage.
Exit.]
HARDCASTLE. There’s morality, however, in his reply. [Exit.]
Enter HASTINGS and MISS NEVILLE.
HASTINGS. My dear Constance, why will you deliberate thus? If we
delay a moment, all is lost for ever. Pluck up a little resolution,
and we shall soon be out of the reach of her malignity.
MISS NEVILLE. I find it impossible. My spirits are so sunk with the
agitations I have suffered, that I am unable to face any new danger.
Two or three years’ patience will at last crown us with happiness.
HASTINGS. Such a tedious delay is worse than inconstancy. Let us fly,
my charmer. Let us date our happiness from this very moment. Perish
fortune! Love and content will increase what we possess beyond a
monarch’s revenue. Let me prevail!
MISS NEVILLE. No, Mr. Hastings, no. Prudence once more comes to my
relief, and I will obey its dictates. In the moment of passion fortune
may be despised, but it ever produces a lasting repentance. I’m
resolved to apply to Mr. Hardcastle’s compassion and justice for
redress.
HASTINGS. But though he had the will, he has not the power to relieve
you.
MISS NEVILLE. But he has influence, and upon that I am resolved to
rely.
HASTINGS. I have no hopes. But since you persist, I must reluctantly
obey you. [Exeunt.]
SCENE changes.
Enter SIR CHARLES and MISS HARDCASTLE.
SIR CHARLES. What a situation am I in! If what you say appears, I
shall then find a guilty son. If what he says be true, I shall then
lose one that, of all others, I most wished for a daughter.
MISS HARDCASTLE. I am proud of your approbation, and to show I merit
it, if you place yourselves as I directed, you shall hear his explicit
declaration. But he comes.
SIR CHARLES. I’ll to your father, and keep him to the appointment.
[Exit SIR CHARLES.]
Enter MARLOW.
MARLOW. Though prepared for setting out, I come once more to take
leave; nor did I, till this moment, know the pain I feel in the
separation.
MISS HARDCASTLE. (In her own natural manner.) I believe sufferings
cannot be very great, sir, which you can so easily remove. A day or
two longer, perhaps, might lessen your uneasiness, by showing the
little value of what you now think proper to regret.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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