England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Humorous stories, English; River life -- Fiction
“I’m sure I don’t know what to make of it,” said Mrs. Henshaw, with a
bewildered air. “Ted Stokes brought round a man named Bell this
afternoon so like you that I can’t tell the difference. I don’t know
what to do, but I do know this—I don’t let you in until I have seen you
both together, so that I can tell which is which.”
“Both together!” exclaimed the startled Mr. Henshaw. “Here—look here!”
He struck a match and, holding it before his face, looked up at the
window. Mrs. Henshaw scrutinized him gravely.
“It’s no good,” she said, despairingly. “I can’t tell. I must see you
both together.”
Mr. Henshaw ground his teeth. “But where is he?” he inquired.
“He went off with Ted Stokes,” said his wife. “If you’re George you’d
better go and ask him.”
She prepared to close the window, but Mr. Henshaw’s voice arrested her.
“And suppose he is not there?” he said.
Mrs. Henshaw reflected. “If he is not there bring Ted Stokes back with
you,” she said at last, “and if he says you’re George, I’ll let you
in.” The window closed and the light disappeared. Mr. Henshaw waited
for some time, but in vain, and, with a very clear idea of the
reception he would meet with at the hands of Mr. Stokes, set off to his
lodging.
If anything, he had underestimated his friend’s powers. Mr. Stokes,
rudely disturbed just as he had got into bed, was the incarnation of
wrath. He was violent, bitter, and insulting in a breath, but Mr.
Henshaw was desperate, and Mr. Stokes, after vowing over and over again
that nothing should induce him to accompany him back to his house, was
at last so moved by his entreaties that he went upstairs and equipped
himself for the journey.
“And, mind, after this I never want to see your face again,” he said,
as they walked swiftly back.
Mr. Henshaw made no reply. The events of the day had almost exhausted
him, and silence was maintained until they reached the house. Much to
his relief he heard somebody moving about upstairs after the first
knock, and in a very short time the window was gently raised and Mrs.
Henshaw looked out.
“What, you’ve come back?” she said, in a low, intense voice. “Well, of
all the impudence! How dare you carry on like this?”
“It’s me,” said her husband.
“Yes, I see it is,” was the reply.
“It’s him right enough; it’s your husband,” said Mr. Stokes. “Alfred
Bell has gone.”
“How dare you stand there and tell me them falsehoods!” exclaimed Mrs.
Henshaw. “I wonder the ground don’t open and swallow you up. It’s Mr.
Bell, and if he don’t go away I’ll call the police.”
Messrs. Henshaw and Stokes, amazed at their reception, stood blinking
up at her. Then they conferred in whispers.
“If you can’t tell ’em apart, how do you know this is Mr. Bell?”
inquired Mr. Stokes, turning to the window again.
“How do I know?” repeated Mrs. Henshaw. “How do I know? Why, because my
husband came home almost directly Mr. Bell had gone. I wonder he didn’t
meet him.”
“Came home?” cried Mr. Henshaw, shrilly. “_Came home_?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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