Humorous stories; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Short stories, American
"Correct," says the lawyer. "One of our brightest young men.
Entertaining talker too. And if I'm not mistaken, it was he who opened a
good-natured discussion as to the limit of actual personal acquaintance
which the average man has, ending by his betting fifty dollars--rather
foolishly, I admit--that you could not remember the names and addresses
of twenty persons whom you actually disliked. Well, you won. Here is the
list you made out."
And the stunned way J. Bayard gawps at the piece of paper brings out a
snicker from me. He flushes up at that and glares down at Judson.
"Tactics worthy of a Tombs lawyer!" says he. "I congratulate you on your
high-class legal methods!"
"Oh, not at all," says Judson. "A suggestion of Mr. Gordon's. Another
evidence of his insight into character, as well as his foresight into
events. So, you see, Mr. Steele, if you decline to become the benefactor
of Mr. Gordon's enemies, his money goes to yours!"
"The old fox!" snarls J. Bayard. "Why--I--let me see that list again."
It's no more'n gripped in his fingers than he steps back quick and
begins tearin' it to bits. I'd jumped for him and had his wrists
clinched when Judson waves me off.
"Only a copy," says he smilin'. "I have several more. Sit down, Mr.
Steele, and let me give you another."
Kind of dazed and subdued, J. Bayard submits to bein' pushed into a
chair. After a minute or so he fixes his glasses again, and begins
starin' at the fresh list, mumblin' over some of the names to himself.
"To them! Three millions!" says he gaspy.
"Roughly estimated," says Judson, "that would be about one hundred and
fifty thousand dollars apiece which you would, in effect, hand over."
"And the only way to keep them from getting it," goes on Steele, "is for
me to spend my time hunting up Pyramid Gordon's lot?"
"Not entirely without recompense," adds the lawyer. "As an inducement
for doing the work thoroughly, I am authorized to give you a commission
on all you spend in that way."
"How much?" demands the other.
"Twenty per cent.," says Judson. "For instance, if in doing some kind
and generous deed for a person on Mr. Gordon's list, you spend, say,
five thousand, you get a thousand for yourself."
"Ah!" says Steele, perkin' up consider'ble.
"The only condition being," goes on the lawyer, "that in each case your
kind and generous proposals must have the indorsement and approval of
Professor McCabe, who is asked to give his advice in these matters on a
five per cent. basis. I may add that a like amount comes to me in place
of any other fee. So you see this is to be a joint enterprise. Is that
satisfactory to you, Mr. McCabe?"
"It's more'n I usually get for my advice," says I, "and I guess Pyramid
Gordon knew well enough he didn't have to pay for anything like that
from me. But if that's the way he planned it out, it goes."
"And you, Mr. Steele?" says Judson.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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