China -- Social life and customs; National characteristics, Chinese
It must not be supposed that the Chinese husbands because they beat their
wives do not love them, for that is not the case. Looking at the Chinese
home in a rough and general way, one is struck with the fact that there is
really a great deal of mutual affection shown both by the husband and the
wife for one another. It is less demonstrative than with the peoples of
the West. Oriental thought and tradition are against the open
demonstration of the love that they feel for each other, still it is
unquestionably the fact that the great majority of the homes in this land
are bound together by a true and a solid affection.
The Chinaman, stolid and unemotional looking, has within him a world of
passion waiting till something rouses it, and then it breaks forth like
one of his own typhoons, reckless of what it may destroy. But beside this
fiery volcanic nature, that leads men who are accustomed to beat their
wives into the most cruel treatment of them, he is moved by forces that
would never influence us; so much so that the forty per cent. that treat
their wives with courtesy and respect are occasionally influenced to join
the ranks of the wife-beaters, simply to avoid the imputation that they
are afraid of them and dare not use the stick to them.
In that most charming and humorous book, _The Chinese Empire_, written by
Abbe Huc, he describes a scene that seems incredible, but which is a true
portrait of what frequently takes place throughout the country. He tells
of a man who was really fond of his wife and who for two or three years
lived on the most affectionate terms with her. He noticed that smiles
passed over the yellow visages of some of the young fellows that he was
acquainted with whenever they passed each other on the street. Flashes of
fun, too, made the black eyes of others gleam, as though the laughter
within them was too great to be suppressed. Furtive glances, too, were
cast upon him by men who seemed anxious not to catch his eye.
He was perplexed at these cryptic signs and tried to get an explanation.
At last one day, a kind friend enlightened him, and explained to him the
mysterious conduct of his neighbours, who, he said, were exceedingly
amused because he had never beaten his wife, and the only reason they
could think of was because he was afraid of her.
There is nothing in the world that a Chinaman dreads so much as being
laughed at. He can stand a great deal, but that stirs his soul in a way
that transforms the solemn, staid-looking Celestial into a raging wild
beast. "If that is all my neighbours have to be amused at," he said,
whilst passion was tearing his soul with a perfect storm of fury, "I can
soon prove to them that they are utterly mistaken, and I will show them in
a most convincing manner that they have been so."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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