"A cause? Yes! every thing must have a cause, I dare say, if one could
but find it out. I only know that the joy was perfect till that storm
arose, and the ship came in with a woman on board, who seemed to disturb
every thing she looked upon. Even Lady Phipps never seemed to draw a
deep breath while she was in the house. As for me! Abby, Abby, you don't
know what torment is, till you have given your whole heart to one
person, and see another stealing him away from you!"
"This," said Abby, who had listened with thoughtful interest, "this is
the feeling they call jealousy, I suppose. Is it so painful?"
"For a time," answered Elizabeth, turning pale with the very
recollection of her suffering, "it seemed as if I must die. Shame,
anger, a keen fear of losing him, kept me silent. But when I was alone,
with the door shut, and the curtains of my bed drawn close, all this
pride and strength gave way; my brain grew hot; the very breath choked
me as it rose; I could neither sleep nor rest, but walked the room all
night, wondering if she thought of him too, if he were watching the
light in her window, or if both were asleep and dreaming of each other.
Sometimes I saw them in the garden, conversing together with the deepest
interest; sometimes they sat in the great portico till the dark crept
around them like a veil; and all this time I was overlooked and
forgotten. Once in a while Norman would seem to remember me with a
start, and force himself to say a few kind words; but there was neither
depth nor earnestness in what he said: the woman had bewitched him, I am
sure of it."
"Bewitched? That is a fearful word," said Abby, looking around with a
wild stare, as if the very foundations of her life had been disturbed by
the word her cousin used.
"Yes, Abby, I solemnly believe she was a witch; for the moment she was
gone all the beauty of my life came back; Norman was himself again; he
seemed to wake up from a dream and wonder what he had been about; at
first, he would not believe how much I suffered, and wondered that I had
grown thin, and that blue shadows were creeping under my eyes, as if his
own neglect had not been the cause; but when Lady Phipps told him how it
was--I would have died fifty times rather than let him know--nothing
could be more generous than his sorrow. He begged my pardon almost on
his knees. There was no kind look or sweet word that he did not coin
into a more loving expression, to win me back to our old happiness."
"And you were happy then?--you are happy now?" said Abby, looking
wistfully into the bright face, over which smiles and blushes came and
went like gleams of sunset on a summer cloud.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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