Bildungsromans; England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Illegitimate children -- Fiction
They walked along silently, each one pondering the other’s
incomprehensibleness, until they came to the stall presided
over by Miss Mabel Bannerman, who in Michael’s opinion bore a
curious resemblance to the Turkish Delight she sold. With the
knowledge of her he had obtained from Drake, Michael regarded
Miss Bannerman very much
as he would have looked at an animal in the Zoological Gardens
with whose habits he had formed a previous acquaintanceship
through a book of natural history. He tried to perceive beyond
her sachet-like hands and watery blue eyes and spongy hair and
full-blown breast the fascination which had made her man’s
common property. Then he looked at Drake, and came to the
conclusion that the problem was not worth the difficulty of
solution.
“I think I’ll be getting back,” said Michael awkwardly.
“Why, it’s not ten,” gasped Drake. “Don’t be an ass. Mabel gets out at
eleven, and we can take her home. Can’t we, Mabel?”
“Sauce!” Mabel archly snapped.
This savoury monosyllable disposed of Michael’s hesitation, and, as the
personality of Mabel cloyed him with a sudden nausea like her own
Turkish Delight, he left her to Drake without another word and went
home to bed.
The night was hot and drew Michael from vain attempts at sleep
to the open window where, as he sat thinking, a strange
visionary survey of the evening, a survey that he himself could
scarcely account for, was conjured up. He had not been aware at
the time of much more than Drake and the Turkish Delight stall.
Now he realized that he too craved for a Mabel, not a peony of
a woman who could be flaunted like a vulgar button-hole, but a
more shy, a more subtle creature, yet conquerable. Then, as
Michael stared out over the housetops at the brooding pavilion
of sky which enclosed the hectic city, he began to recall the
numberless glances, the countless attitudes, all the sensuous
phantasmagoria of the Exhibition’s population. He remembered a
slim hand, a slanting eye, lips translucent in a burst of
light. He caught at scents that, always fugitive, were now
utterly incommunicable; he trembled at the remembrance of some
contact in a crowd
that had been at once divinely intimate and unendurably
remote. The illusion of all the city’s sleepers calling to him
became more and more vivid under each stifling breath of the
night. Somewhere beneath that sable diadem of chimney-tops she
lay, that lovely girl of his desire. He would not picture her
too clearly lest he should destroy the charm of this amazing
omnipotence of longing. He would be content to enfold the
imagination of her, and at dawn let her slip from his arms
like a cloud.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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