Bildungsromans; England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Illegitimate children -- Fiction
“To-morrow night by all means,” Mrs. Fane agreed.
“Nothing has happened?” she asked anxiously. “You seem so flushed and
strange.”
“I’m just the same as usual,” Michael declared. “It’s hot in this room.
I think I’ll take a short walk.”
“But you’ve been out all the afternoon,” Mrs. Fane protested.
“Oh, well, I’ve nothing to do at home.”
“You’re not feverish?”
“No, no, mother,” Michael affirmed, disengaging his parched hand from
her solicitous touch. “But you know I often feel restless.”
She released him, tenderly smiling; and for one moment he nearly threw
himself down beside her, covetous of childhood’s petting. But the
impulse spent itself before he acted upon it, and soon he was wandering
towards Trelawny Road. How empty the corner of it looked, how stark and
melancholy soared the grey houses guarding its consecrated entrance,
how solitary shone the lamp-posts, and how sadly echoed the footsteps
of people going home. Yet only three hours ago they had met on this
very flagstone that must almost have palpitated to the pressure of her
shoes.
Michael walked on until he stood opposite her house. There was
a light in the bay-window by the front door; perhaps she would
come out to post a letter. O breathless thought! Surely he
heard the sound of a turning handle. Ah, why had he not begged
her to draw aside the blind at a fixed time that he could be
cured of his longing by the vision of her darling form against
the pane? How bitter was the irony of her sitting behind that
brooding window-pane, unconscious of him. Two days must crawl
past before she would meet him again, before he would touch her
hand, look actually into her eyes, watch every quiver and curve
of her mouth. Places would be enriched with the sight of her,
while he ached with the torment of love. School must drag
through ten intolerable hours; he must chatter with
people unaware of her; and she must live two days apart from
his life, two days whose irresponsible minutes and loveless
occupations made him burn with jealousy of time itself.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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