Bildungsromans; England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Illegitimate children -- Fiction
Next morning when Michael woke, his resolve purified by sleep of
feverish and hysterical promptings was fresh upon his pillow. In the
fatigue and strain of the preceding night the adventure had caught a
hectic glow of exaltation. Now, with the sparrows twittering and the
milkman clanking and yodeling down Cheyne Walk and the young air
puffing the curtains, his course acquired a simplicity in this lucid
hour of deliberation, which made the future normal and even obvious.
There was a great relief in this fresh following breeze after the
becalmed inaction of Oxford: it seemed an augury of life’s importance
that so immediately on top of the Oxford dream he should find such a
complete dispersion of mist and so urgent a fairway before him. The
task of finding Lily might easily occupy him for some time, for a life
like hers would be made up of mutable appearances and sudden strange
eclipses. It might well be a year before she was seen again on the
Orient Promenade. Yet it was just as likely that he would find her at
once. For a moment he caught his breath in thinking of the sudden
plunge which that meeting would involve. He thought of all the
arguments and all the dismay that the revelation of his purpose would
set in motion. However, the marriage had to be. He had threshed it all
out last night. But he might reasonably hope for a brief delay. Such a
hope was no disloyalty to his determination.
Stella was already at breakfast when he came downstairs. Michael raised
his eyebrows in demand for news of her and Alan.
“Mother was the sweetest thing imaginable,” she said. “And so we’re
engaged. I wanted to come and talk to you last night, but I thought you
would rather be left alone.”
“I’m glad you’re happy,” he said gravely. “And I’m glad you’re safe.”
Stella looked at him in surprise.
“I’ve never been anything but safe,” she assured him.
“Haven’t you?” he asked, looking at her and reproving himself for the
thought that this gray-eyed sister of his could ever have exposed
herself to the least likelihood of falling into Lily’s case. Yet there
had been times when he had felt alarmed for her security and happiness.
There had been that fellow Ayliffe, and more serious still there had
been that unknown influence in Vienna. Invulnerable she might seem now
in this cool dining-room on a summer morning, but there had been times
when he had doubted.
“What are you looking at?” she asked, flaunting her imperious
boyishness in his solemn countenance.
“You. Thinking you ought to be damned grateful.”
“What for?”
“Everything.”
“You included, I suppose,” she laughed.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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