Bildungsromans; England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Illegitimate children -- Fiction
thoroughfares, an arc-lamp fizzed above the shape of a solitary
policeman, and the corner-houses stood out sharper and more cadaverous.
And always in contrast with these necropolitan streets, these masks of
human dwellings, were Michael’s own thoughts thronged with fancies of
himself and Lily.
It was nearly one o’clock when he walked over the arcuated bridge
across the lake of railway lines and turned the corner into Leppard
Street. From the opposite pavement a woman’s figure stepped quickly
toward him out of a circle of lamplight. The sudden shadow lanced
across the road made him start. Perhaps she noticed him jump, for she
stopped at once and stared at him owlishly. He felt sick for a moment,
and yet he could not, from an absurd compassion for her, do as he would
have liked and run.
“Where are you off to in such a hurry?” he heard her say.
It was too late to avoid her now. He only had two sovereigns in his
pocket. It would be ridiculous and cowardly to escape by offering her
one of them. He had given his last silver coin to the match-seller. Yet
it would have been just as cowardly to have offered her that. He pitied
the degradation that prompted her so casual question; the diffidence in
her tones marked the fear of answering brutality which must always
haunt her. Now that she was close to him, he no longer dreaded her. She
was not an ancient drab, a dreadful old woman with black cotton gloves,
as at first he had shuddered to suppose her. If those raddled smears
and that deathly blanch of coarse powder were cleared from her cheeks,
there would be nothing to attract or repel: she would scarcely become
even an individual in the multitude of weary London women.
“Where are you off to, dearie, in such a hurry?” she repeated.
“Home. I’m going home,” he said.
“Let’s walk a bit of the way together.”
He could say nothing to her, and if he hurried on, he would hear her
voice whining after him like a cat in a yard. He did not wish to let
her know where he was living; for every evening he would expect to see
her materialize from a quivering circle of lamplight so close to
Leppard Street.
“Why don’t you come back with me? I live quite near here,” she
murmured. “Go on. You look as if you wanted someone to make a fuss of
you.”
Already they were beside the five houses that rose jet-black against
the star-incrusted sky.
“Come on, dear. I live in the corner house.”
Michael looked at her in astonishment, and she mistaking his scrutiny
smiled in pitiable allurement. He felt as if a marionette were
blandishing him. The woman evidently thought he was considering the
question of money, and she sidled close up to him.
“Go on, dear, you’ve got some money with you?”
“It’s not that,” said Michael. “I don’t want to come in with you.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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