Sink or swim? : $b a novel; vol. 3/3Houstoun, Mrs. (Matilda Charlotte)
General
Sink or swim? : $b a novel; vol. 3/3
Houstoun, Mrs. (Matilda Charlotte)
English fiction -- 19th century
He stopped abruptly; for there were circumstances connected with the
possible victim of Colonel Norcott’s rascality that would effectually
check any feelings of pity which John might be inclined to entertain for
him. Could the mother who bore him have looked into the heart of her
only child that day, she would bitterly have repented the stirring-up of
the smouldering fire within which her words--uttered, as so many
dangerous words _are_ uttered, without much thought of future
consequences--had effected. It is easy, terribly easy, to raise the
demon of suspicion and jealousy in the human breast. Were the laying of
the same an equally facile task, or one equally congenial to the
unregenerate nature of men and women, there would be fewer of the crimes
consequent on the strength of our worst passions to record, fewer
blighted lives, fewer consciences burdened with the weight of scarcely
bearable remorse. But though the woman, whose tongue had wagged (without
ulterior design, but simply as a consequence of her own maternal
jealousy) to such fell purpose, could not read the heart she had
unconsciously been working up to madness, she yet experienced something
very like uneasiness when John, with the heavy cloud still lowering over
his brow, and with the ruddy brown half-vanished from his cheeks (so
changed was he since the poison of suspicion had suffused itself through
his veins), left her alone to ruminate on the past, and anticipate
darker doings in the future than she had either hoped or calculated on.
That John--the dearly-beloved of her aged heart, the son of whom she was
so justly proud--could prove himself, under provocation, to be of a very
violent and passionate nature, she had not now to learn. He had done his
best to subdue and conquer his constitutional sin; a sin, however, it
was that might and did lie dormant, and indeed half forgotten, within
him, from the simple fact that it required the great occasions that
happily are comparatively rare in all our lives to bring it into notice
and action. The blow struck in a moment of ungovernable rage at
Frederick Norcott’s unprotected head had for a time, as we already
know, filled John Beacham’s breast with remorse and self-reproach. He
had been very angry with himself, very angry and ashamed; but that shame
and anger had not, in any degree, either softened his nature or disposed
him to any especial leniency towards his victim. On the contrary, the
soreness produced by self-condemnation, and by imagined loss of caste,
only served to better prepare the mind of the man for the reception of
evil suspicions, and of perilously active venom; and when John Beacham
left the quiet little parlour, and the tardily-repentant old lady, who,
when it was too late, would gladly have recalled her words, he was in
the mood of mind that leads, at down-hill pace, to crime.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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