The young man passed, during a portion of the rest of the day, the
strangest hours of his life. Yet he thought of them afterwards not as a
phase of temptation, though they had been full of the emotion that
accompanies an intense vision of alternatives. The struggle was already
over; it seemed to him that, poor as he was, he was not poor enough to
take Mr. Locket’s money. He looked at the opposed courses with the
self-possession of a man who has chosen, but this self-possession was in
itself the most exquisite of excitements. It was really a high revulsion
and a sort of noble pity. He seemed indeed to have his finger upon the
pulse of history and to be in the secret of the gods. He had them all in
his hand, the tablets and the scales and the torch. He couldn’t keep a
character together, but he might easily pull one to pieces. That would
be “creative work” of a kind—he could reconstruct the character less
pleasingly, could show an unknown side of it. Mr. Locket had had a good
deal to say about responsibility; and responsibility in truth sat there
with him all the morning, while he revolved in his narrow cage and,
watching the crude spring rain on the windows, thought of the dismalness
to which, at Dover, Mrs. Ryves was going back. This influence took in
fact the form, put on the physiognomy of poor Sir Dominick Ferrand; he
was at present as perceptible in it, as coldly and strangely personal, as
if he had been a haunting ghost and had risen beside his own old
hearthstone. Our friend was accustomed to his company and indeed had
spent so many hours in it of late, following him up at the museum and
comparing his different portraits, engravings and lithographs, in which
there seemed to be conscious, pleading eyes for the betrayer, that their
queer intimacy had grown as close as an embrace. Sir Dominick was very
dumb, but he was terrible in his dependence, and Peter would not have
encouraged him by so much curiosity nor reassured him by so much
deference had it not been for the young man’s complete acceptance of the
impossibility of getting out of a tight place by exposing an individual.
It didn’t matter that the individual was dead; it didn’t matter that he
was dishonest. Peter felt him sufficiently alive to suffer; he perceived
the rectification of history so conscientiously desired by Mr. Locket to
be somehow for himself not an imperative task. It had come over him too
definitely that in a case where one’s success was to hinge upon an act of
extradition it would minister most to an easy conscience to let the
success go. No, no—even should he be starving he couldn’t make money out
of Sir Dominick’s disgrace. He was almost surprised at the violence of
the horror with which, as he shuffled mournfully about, the idea of any
such profit inspired him. What was Sir Dominick to him after all? He
wished he had never come across him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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