He raised his face and put his arms about her neck. “I haven’t been good
to you, mother. It’s like you to say that I have; but I haven’t. I’ve
ignored you and given the best of myself to some one for whom it has
no value. I’ve been sharp and irritable to you. You’ve wanted to ask
questions--you had a right to ask questions; I’ve kept you at arm’s
length. You’ve wanted to do what you’re doing now--to hold me close and
show me that you cared; and I’ve--I’ve felt like striking you. That’s
the way with a man when he’s pitied. You know I have.”
The gray head nodded. “But I’ve always understood, and--and you don’t
want to strike me any longer.”
“You’re dearer than any woman in the world.”
“Dearer, but not so much desired.” She drew back from him, holding his
face between her hands. “Hal, you’re my son, and you must listen to
me. Perhaps I’m only a prejudiced old woman, years behind the times and
jealous for my son’s happiness. Put it down to that, Hal; but let me
have my say out. When I was young, girls didn’t treat men as Vashti
treats you. If they loved a man, they married him. If they didn’t love
him, they told him. They didn’t play fast and loose with him, and take
presents from him, and keep him in suspense, and waste his power of
hoping. It’s the finest moment in a good girl’s life when a good man
puts his life in her hands. If a girl can’t appreciate that, there’s
something wrong with her--something so wrong that she can never make the
most persistent lover happy. Vashti’s beautiful on the outside and she’s
talented, but--but she’s not wholesome.”
There was a pause full of unspoken pleadings and threatenings. The man
jerked sharply away from his mother. Her hands slipped from his face to
his shoulders. They stayed there clinging to him. His attitude was alert
with offense.
“Shall I go on?” she asked tremulously.
His answer came grimly. “Go on.”
“It’s the truth I’m telling you, Hal--the truth, as any one can see it
except yourself. Beneath her charm she’s cold and selfish. Selfishness
is like frost; it kills everything. In time it would kill your passion.
She’s gracious till she gets a man in her power, then she’s capricious.
You haven’t told me what she’s done to you, my dear. I’m a woman; I can
guess--I can guess. She doesn’t love you. She loves to be loved;
she never thinks of loving in return. She’s kept you begging like a
dog--you, who are my son, of whom any girl might be proud. Perhaps
you think that, if she were your wife, it would make a difference. It
wouldn’t. You’d spend all your life sitting up like a dog, waiting for
her to find time to pet you. You’re my son--the best son a mother ever
had. It’s a woman’s business to worship her man, even though she blinds
herself to do it You shan’t be a vain woman’s plaything.”
She waited for him to say something. She would have preferred the most
brutal anger to this silence. It struck her down. He knelt before her
rigid, breathing heavily, his face hard and set.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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