Sleep Walking and Moon Walking: A Medico-Literary Study — John Shaqi
Sleep Walking and Moon Walking: A Medico-Literary StudySadger, J.
Science
Sleep Walking and Moon Walking: A Medico-Literary Study
Sadger, J.
Psychoanalysis; Sleepwalking
"Mother began raising blood again when I was ten years old and we had
already moved into the new home. That year she was seized twice with
such severe hemorrhages that for weeks she hovered between life and
death. Then in my eleventh year I began my sleep walking. What urged me
to it was again Mother's coughing of blood as well as the desire to see
her blood, both reasons why I had already at four years old pretended
sleep so that I could climb into Mother's bed."
The patient proved herself such an ideal nurse on the occasion of the
mother's severe hemorrhage that the mother would have no one else. She
watched tirelessly day and night together with her sisters, changing
every few minutes the icebags which had been ordered. "Scarcely a moment
did I tear myself away from my mother's bedside and, if one of my
sisters relieved me, I often could hardly move, undress myself and lie
down for an hour. If I did lie down, I threw myself about restlessly,
torn with anxiety, and was only happy again when I sat by my mother's
bed." This fearful anxiety was not however merely fear for the precious
life of the mother, but still more, repressed libido. In spite of all
her concern for the mother's suffering she could not prevent the
strongest sexual pleasurable sensations at the sight of the mother's
snow white breast in putting on the applications or when she raised
blood. This intensive nursing lasted four weeks until finally a nursing
Sister came to assist.
"As I now for the first time could enjoy a full night's rest, I fell
into a deep sleep, as from this time on I always did before every sleep
walking. Near my bed stood the table with Mother's medicine and on the
window ledge, behind the curtain, a lamp, which threw its light upon my
bed. Suddenly I arose in my sleep, went to my mother's bed, bent over
her. Mother opened her eyes but did not rouse herself. Then the Sister,
who was dozing on the sofa near Mother's bed, awoke and rushed forward
frightened as she saw me there in my nightgown. She thought something
had happened to Mother, but the latter motioned with her hand to leave
me alone and to keep still. I kissed Mother and changed the icebag,
apparently in order to see her breast. I could see no blood this time,
so without a sound I moved away and went to the table, where I put all
the medicines carefully together to make a place and then went out into
the pitch dark kitchen without stumbling against anything. There I took
from the kitchen dresser a bowl with a saucer and a spoon and came back
again to the room. Next I seized a glass of water which stood there and
poured the water carefully into the bowl without spilling more than a
drop. With this I spoke out half aloud to myself: 'Now Emil (my
brother-in-law, who had for a long time taken his breakfast with us) can
come to his breakfast without disturbing Mother, who had always prepared
it for him.' Then I went to bed and slept soundly for some hours, as I
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