Leon.--As a joke--
Jadwiga.--At which one cannot laugh always. If our century was not
sceptical I should think myself wild, romantic, trying to drown
despair. But the romantic times have passed away, therefore, frankly
speaking, I only try to fill up a great nothing. I also spin out my
ball, although not always with pleasure. Sometimes I seem to myself so
miserable and my life so empty that I rush to my prayer-desk, left by
my mother. I weep, I pray--and then I laugh again at my prayers and
tears. And so it goes on--round and round. Do you know that they
gossip about me?
Leon.--I do not listen to the gossip.
Jadwiga.--How good you are! I will tell you then why they gossip. A
missionary asked a negro what, according to his ideas, constituted
evil? The negro thought a while, and then said: "Evil is if some one
were to steal my wife." "And what is good?" asked the missionary.
"Good is when I steal from some one else." My husband's friends are of
the negro's opinion. Every one of them would like to do a good deed
and steal some one's wife.
Leon.--It depends on the wife.
Jadwiga.--Yes, but every word and every look is a bait. If the fish
passes the bait, the fisherman's self-love is wounded. That is why
they slander me (after a while). You great people--you are filled with
simplicity. Then you think it depends on the wife?
Leon.--Yes, it does.
Jadwiga.--_Morbleu!_ as my husband says, and if the wife is weary?
Leon.--I bid you good-bye.
Jadwiga.--Why? Does what I say offend you?
Leon.--It does more than offend me. It hurts me. Maybe it will
seem strange to you, but here in my breast I am carrying some
flowers--although they are withered--dead for a long time. But they
are dear to me and just now you are trampling on them.
Jadwiga (with an outburst).--Oh, if those flowers had not died!
Leon.--They are in my heart--and there is a tomb. Let us leave the
past alone.
Jadwiga.--Yes, you are right. Leave it alone. What is dead cannot
be resuscitated. I wish to speak calmly. Look at my situation. What
defends me--what helps me--what protects me? I am a young woman, and
it seems not ugly, and therefore no one approaches me with an honest,
simple heart, but with a trap in eyes and mouth. What opposition have
I to make? Weariness? Grief? Emptiness? In life even a man must lean
on something, and I, a feeble woman, I am like a boat without a helm,
without oar and without light toward which to sail. And the heart
longs for happiness. You must understand that a woman must be loved
and must love some one in the world, and if she lacks true love she
seizes the first pretext of it--the first shadow.
Leon (with animation).--Poor thing.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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