Christmas stories, English; Holidays -- Fiction; Short stories
When I die in the Clapham Road, I shall not leave much more in this world
than I shall take out of it; but, I happen to have a miniature of a
bright-faced boy, with a curling head, and an open shirt-frill waving
down his bosom (my mother had it taken for me, but I can’t believe that
it was ever like), which will be worth nothing to sell, and which I shall
beg may he given to Frank. I have written my dear boy a little letter
with it, in which I have told him that I felt very sorry to part from
him, though bound to confess that I knew no reason why I should remain
here. I have given him some short advice, the best in my power, to take
warning of the consequences of being nobody’s enemy but his own; and I
have endeavoured to comfort him for what I fear he will consider a
bereavement, by pointing out to him, that I was only a superfluous
something to every one but him; and that having by some means failed to
find a place in this great assembly, I am better out of it.
Such (said the poor relation, clearing his throat and beginning to speak
a little louder) is the general impression about me. Now, it is a
remarkable circumstance which forms the aim and purpose of my story, that
this is all wrong. This is not my life, and these are not my habits. I
do not even live in the Clapham Road. Comparatively speaking, I am very
seldom there. I reside, mostly, in a—I am almost ashamed to say the
word, it sounds so full of pretension—in a Castle. I do not mean that it
is an old baronial habitation, but still it is a building always known to
every one by the name of a Castle. In it, I preserve the particulars of
my history; they run thus:
It was when I first took John Spatter (who had been my clerk) into
partnership, and when I was still a young man of not more than
five-and-twenty, residing in the house of my uncle Chill, from whom I had
considerable expectations, that I ventured to propose to Christiana. I
had loved Christiana a long time. She was very beautiful, and very
winning in all respects. I rather mistrusted her widowed mother, who I
feared was of a plotting and mercenary turn of mind; but, I thought as
well of her as I could, for Christiana’s sake. I never had loved any one
but Christiana, and she had been all the world, and O far more than all
the world, to me, from our childhood!
Christiana accepted me with her mother’s consent, and I was rendered very
happy indeed. My life at my uncle Chill’s was of a spare dull kind, and
my garret chamber was as dull, and bare, and cold, as an upper prison
room in some stern northern fortress. But, having Christiana’s love, I
wanted nothing upon earth. I would not have changed my lot with any
human being.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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