Portugal -- Social life and customs; Spain -- Social life and customs
When a Spaniard goes into a shop where a woman is behind the counter, or
even to a stall in the open market, he raises his hat in speaking to her
as he would to the Duquesa de Tal y Fulano, and uses precisely the same
form of address. The shopman lays himself at the feet of his lady
customers--metaphorically only, fortunately, _Á los pies de V.,
Señora!_--with a bow worthy of royalty. She hopes that "God may remain
with his worship" as she bids him the ordinary _Adios_ on going away,
and he, with equal politeness, expresses a hope that she may "go in
God's keeping," while he once more lays himself at the señora's feet.
All these amenities do not prevent a little bargaining, the one asking
more than he means to take, apparently for the purpose of appearing to
give way perforce to the overmastering charms of his customer, who does
not disdain to use either her fan or her eyes in the encounter. The old
woman will bargain just as much, but always with the same politeness.
When foreigners walk in and abruptly ask for what they want with an air
of immense superiority, as is the custom in our country, they are not
unnaturally looked upon as _muy bruto_, and at the best it is accounted
for by their being rude heretics from abroad, and knowing no better.
In Madrid and some of the large towns it is possible that the people
have become accustomed to our apparent discourtesy, just as in some
places--Granada especially--spoiled by long intimacy with tourists, the
beggars have become importunate, and to some extent impudent; but in
places a little removed from such a condition of modern "civilisation,"
the effect produced by many a well-meaning but ordinary Saxon priding
himself on his superiority, and without any intention of being ill-bred
or ill-mannered, is that of disgust and contemptuous annoyance.
No Spaniard will put up with an overbearing or bullying manner, even
though he may not understand the language in which it is expressed; it
raises in him all the dormant pride and prejudice which sleep beneath
his own innate courtesy, and he probably treats the offending traveller
with the profound contempt he feels for him, if with nothing worse. A
little smiling and good-natured chaff when things go wrong, as they so
often do in travelling, or when the leisurely expenditure of time, which
is as natural to the Spaniard as it is irritating to our notions of how
things ought to move, will go infinitely farther to set things right
than black looks and a scolding tongue, even in an unknown language.
When English people come back from Spain complaining of discourtesy, or
what they choose to call insult, I know very well on whose head to fit
the accusing cap, and it is always those people whose super-excellent
opinion of themselves, and of their infinite importance at home, makes
them certain of meeting with some such experience among a people to whom
the mere expression "a snob" is by no means to be understood.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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