English fiction -- 20th century; Social satire, English
When she woke again it was morning for she had been sore tired by all
the events and had slept round the clock twice. Beneath her
lace-veiled window the voice of many newsboys cried a name she seemed
to know, so slipping from her bed she flew to have a peep into the
street, and hanging well out she saw oh with what glee and pride writ
large on every plachard held before the stomaches of the newsboys
these words:
HOW I DID IT:
By H. Withersquash
(Head Poet)
Now was Selia indeed moved to pride, and wept a tear into the
window-sill to think how dearly she loved him and how high she had to
rise yet before worthy to sit beside him as wife and matron. So she
crossed her little fingers and wished hard that she might soon get a
good leg up through her good friends the Majpottels, after which she
slided out of her clothes and things and had a nice wash in the basin
all over altho not knowing that such is corect nature taught her it
was best so every day. And while doing up her hair she practiced
talking in the new voice and warking with ease in the new thin shoes,
and so with a last dab of powder from a pretty little glass pot on her
dress-table, she popped downt to breakfast very spry and determined to
win.
And throughout London newsboys shouted the fame of Mr. Withersquash.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Mr. Withersq was already digging at the last of his second egg with
rather a cross face, as he really preferred duck’s eggs as being more
sustaining, when she entered their private eating apartment at whose
door stood a chef sent to watch over their food by the hotel manager.
“Hello dearie” cried he rising and casting the gloom off his face, as
he had learnt to rise for ladys by now. “We have a treat in store for
to-day.” And he nodded to the chef to bring Selia her breakfast, which
the good man with his white hat did and then retired out of the room.
“Oh Harold what is it?” she cried settling her new brown gown, “is it
a better kind of party?”
“Well hardly” said Mr. Withersq resuming his egg, “it is to go to a
trial.”
“Oh! How delishus” said Selia in glee, “is it a murder?”
“No” said Mr. Withersq, “it is much better, it is a divorce, murders
being a little vulgar. But the very cream go to divorces, and were it
not for my having this morning before you rose purchaced a good half
of the _Daily Pull_ and put the editor in my pocket I do not think
even we should have got in.”
“Oh so now you have a newspaper” chirped his love.
“Yes” said Mr. Withersq hortily “and as it is we have seats in the
front.”
Truly pleased by this thoughtful and lucky idea Selia fell to and
despatched her food after which they stepped into a taxi and rode to
the law court.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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