Squire Arden; volume 3 of 3Oliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
General
Squire Arden; volume 3 of 3
Oliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
England -- Fiction; Families -- Fiction; Inheritance and succession -- Fiction; Landowners -- Fiction
He went down to the village vaguely, like a man in a dream. When he got
to the great gate he asked himself, with a sort of curious wonder and
interest, Should he go and tell Mr. Fielding--resolve all the Doctor’s
doubts for ever? But decided no, because he was too tired. Besides, he
had not made up his mind what was to be done. He had not fully realised
it--he had only felt the blow, and the rending, tearing pain--and now
the hush after the operation, his veins still tingling, his flesh
palpitating, but some soft opiate giving him a momentary, sweet
forgetfulness of his suffering. Sufferers who have taken a very strong
opiate often feel as Edgar did, especially if it does not bring sleep,
but only a strange insensibility, an unexplainable trance of relief. He
walked on and on, and he did not think. The thing had happened, the
knife had come down; but the shearing and rending were past, and he was
quiet. He was able to say nothing, think nothing--only to wait. At the
present moment this was all.
And then he went down in his dream to the cottage where Jeanie was. As
the women curtseyed to him at their doors, and the school-children made
their little bobs, he asked himself, why? Would they do it if they knew?
What would the village think? How would the information be received?
Those Pimpernels, for instance, who had turned Arthur Arden out, how
would they take it? Somehow, Edgar felt as if he himself had changed
with Arthur Arden. It was he, he thought, who had become the poor
cousin--he who was the one disinherited. We say he thought, but he did
not really think; it was but the upper line of fancy in his mind--the
floating surface to his thoughts. Though he had not made up his mind to
any course of action, and was not even capable of thinking, yet at the
same time he felt disposed to stop and speak to everybody, and say
certain words of explanation. What could he say? You are making a
mistake. This is not me; or, rather, I am not the person you take me
for. Was that what he ought to say? And he smiled once more that curious
smile, in which a certain pathetic humour mingled. “Who am I?” he said
to himself. “What am I?--a man without a name.” It gave him a strange,
wild, melancholy amusement. It was part of the effect of the laudanum;
and yet he had not taken any laudanum. His opiate was only the great
pain, the sleepless night--the sudden softening, calming influence of
the fresh day.
“She’s opened her eyes once,” said Mrs. Hesketh, at the cottage door.
“You don’t think much of that, sir; but it’s a deal. She opened her
eyes, and put out her hand, and said, ‘Granny!’ Oh, it’s a deal, sir, is
that! The Doctor is as pleased as Punch; and as for t’oud dame----”
“Is she pleased?” said Edgar.
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