Mr. St. John waved his hat to his wife at the open window. She had
seen it all; the loving meeting with the one child, the neglect of the
other. Passion, anger, jealousy, waged war within her. She could no
more have controlled them than she could control the wind that was
making free with her husband's hair. All she saw, all she felt, was
that he had betrayed his ardent love for Benja, his indifference to
_her_ child. In that one moment she was as a mad woman.
What exactly occurred upon his entrance, George St. John could not
afterwards remember; he was too much scared, too terrified, it may be
said, to receive or retain any correct impression. A strange, wild
look on his wife's face, telling, as it seemed to him, of madness; a
wail of reproaches, such as had never been addressed to him from
woman's lips; Benja struck to the ground with a violent blow, and his
cheek bleeding from it, passed before his eyes as in a troubled
vision. It appeared to last but a moment; but a moment: the next, she
had sunk on a sofa; pale, trembling, hysterical.
George St. John collected his scattered senses, and picked up the
child. He wiped his poor little outraged face with a handkerchief,
laid it on his bosom for an instant to soothe him to composure, and
carried him into the hall to Honour. The girl cried out when she saw
the cheek, and looked up at her master with inquiring eyes. But his
were averted.
"An accident," he quietly said. "Wash it with a little warm water."
He returned to the room, closing the door on himself and his wife. He
did not reproach her by so much as a word: he did not speak to her: he
went to the window and stood there in silence, looking out, his back
turned to her, and his forehead pressed against one of the panes.
She began to utter reproaches now, sobbing violently; fond reproaches,
that all his affection was lavished upon Benja, leaving none for her
child. He replied coldly, without turning round, that his affection
was as lively for one child as for the other; he was not conscious of
any difference, and hoped he never should be: but an infant of five
months old who cried at his approach, could not yet be made the
companion to him that Benja was.
"Oh, George, forgive me!" she sobbed, coming close to him, and laying
her hand on him caressingly. "I love--I love you; and I could not bear
it. He _is_ our child, you know; yours and mine; and it seemed as if
he was nothing to you beside Benja. Won't you forgive me?"
He could not resist the pleading words; he could not throw back the
soft hand that was stealing itself into his. "I forgive it; if you
think forgiveness lies with me, Charlotte," he answered, turning round
at last, but speaking sadly and quietly.
"You have not kissed me," she whispered, the tears chasing each other
down her cheeks.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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