For one single moment--for one moment only--a wild sort of glare, of
angry disappointment, shot from the eyes of Mrs. St. John. Honour drew
back scared, shocked: it had betrayed to the attendant more than she
ought to know.
But do not set down Charlotte St. John as a wicked woman. She was not
wicked yet. The feeling--whatever its precise nature--had arisen
unbidden: she could not help it; and when she became conscious of it,
she shuddered at it just as much as Honour could have done. But she
did not detect its danger.
The party dispersed. And Mrs. St. John, in a soft muslin wrapper, was
watching by the cradle of Benja, who was in a sweet sleep now. She had
kissed him and cried over him when they first met; and George St.
John's heart throbbed with pleasure at these tokens of her affection
for the child. Benja had slipped into the lake himself, and for two or
three minutes was not observed; otherwise there had been no danger.
The danger, however, was over now, and Mr. Pym had gone home, loudly
promising Benja a hatful of physic as a punishment for his
carelessness. Mrs. St. John and the household went to rest at
midnight, leaving Honour sitting up with the boy. There was not the
least necessity for her sitting up, but she would not hear of his not
being watched till morning. The child, in fact, was her idol.
Presently Mr. St. John came in, and Honour started and rose. She had
been half asleep in her chair, and she had thought her master had gone
to bed.
He lay with his little face, unusually flushed, on the pillow, his
silken hair rather wild, and one arm outside the clothes; a charming
picture, as most children are when asleep. Mr. St. John bent over the
boy on the other side the crib, apparently listening to his breathing;
but Honour thought her master was praying, for his eyes were closed,
and she saw his lips moving.
"We should not have liked to lose him, Honour," he observed with a
smile, when he looked up.
"To lose him! Oh, sir! I would rather have died myself."
"It might have been a care less for me to leave, though!" he resumed
in an abstracted tone. "His mother gone, and I gone: the world may be
a cold one for Benja."
"But you are not--you are not fearing for yourself, sir!" exclaimed
Honour, quite forgetting, in the shock the words gave her, that it was
no business of hers to answer the thoughts of her master.
"I don't know, Honour. I have fancied of late that I may not be here
very long."
"Heaven grant you may be mistaken, sir!" was the impulsive aspiration
of the girl: "for this child's sake!"
Her master looked at her, struck by the tone of terror, as much as by
the words. "Why for his sake? Should anything happen to me, Honour,
you must all take the greater care of him. Your mistress; you; all of
you."
An impulse came over Honour to speak out somewhat of her thoughts; one
of those strange impulses that bear the will with them as a torrent
not to be controlled.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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