Not at the first, second, nor third call, but _ex intervallo_, as the lawyers express it, Eppie, a bare-legged, shock-headed, thick-ankled, red-armed wench, entered, and announced her presence by an emphatic "What's your wull?" "Have you got any thing in the house for dinner, Eppie?" "Naething but bread and milk, plenty o't--what should I have?" "You see, sir," said Mr. Cargill, "you are like to have a Pythagorean entertainment; but you are a traveller, and have doubtless been in your time thankful for bread and milk." "But never when there was any thing better to be had," said Mr. Touchwood. "Come, Doctor, I beg your pardon, but your wits are fairly gone a wool-gathering; it was _I_ invited _you_ to dinner, up at the inn yonder, and not you me." "On my word, and so it was," said Mr. Cargill; "I knew I was quite right--I knew there was a dinner engagement betwixt us, I was sure of that, and that is the main point.--Come, sir, I wait upon you." "Will you not first change your dress?" said the visitor, seeing with astonishment that the divine proposed to attend him in his plaid nightgown; "why, we shall have all the boys in the village after us--you will look like an owl in sunshine, and they will flock round you like so many hedge-sparrows." "I will get my clothes instantly," said the worthy clergyman; "I will get ready directly--I am really ashamed to keep you waiting, my dear Mr.--eh--eh--your name has this instant escaped me." "It is Touchwood, sir, at your service; I do not believe you ever heard it before," answered the traveller. "True--right--no more I have--well, my good Mr. Touchstone, will you sit down an instant until we see what we can do?--strange slaves we make ourselves to these bodies of ours, Mr. Touchstone--the clothing and the sustaining of them costs us much thought and leisure, which might be better employed in catering for the wants of our immortal spirits." Mr. Touchwood thought in his heart that never had Bramin or Gymnosophist less reason to reproach himself with excess in the indulgence of the table, or of the toilet, than the sage before him; but he assented to the doctrine, as he would have done to any minor heresy, rather than protract matters by farther discussing the point at present. In a short time the minister was dressed in his Sunday's suit, without any farther mistake than turning one of his black stockings inside out; and Mr. Touchwood, happy as was Boswell when he carried off Dr. Johnson in triumph to dine with Strahan and John Wilkes, had the pleasure of escorting him to the Cleikum Inn.