Christian life -- Fiction; Conduct of life -- Fiction
"You don't mean that she is going to die?" I asked.
"I fear she is. But not immediately." He took leave, and I went back
to the bedside. I saw there no longer a snuffy, repulsive old woman,
but a human being about to make that mysterious journey a far country
whence there is no return. Oh, how I wished mother were there!
"Susan," I said, "have you any relatives?"
"No, I haven't," she answered sharply. "And if I had they needn't
come prowling around me. I don't want no relations about my body."
"Would you like to see Dr. Cabot?"
"What should I want of Dr. Cabot? Don't tease, child."
Considering the deference with which she had heretofore treated me,
this was quite a new order of things.
I sat down and tried to pray for her, silently, in my heart. Who was
to go with her on that long journey, and where was it to end?
The woman who had been caring for her now went away, and it was
growing dark. I sat still listening to my own heart, which beat till
it half choked me.
"What were you and the doctor whispering about?" she suddenly burst
out.
"He asked me, for one thing, if you had any friends that could be
sent for."
"I've been my own best friend," she returned. "Who'd have raked and
scraped and hoarded and counted for Susan Green if I hadn't ha' done
it? I've got enough to make me comfortable as long as I live, and
when I lie on my dying bed."
"But you can't carry it with you," I said. This highly original
remark was all I had courage to utter.
"I wish I could," she cried. "I suppose you think I talk awful. They
say you are getting most to be as much of a saint as your ma. It's
born in some, and in some it ain't. Do get a light. It's lonesome
here in the dark, and cold."
I was thankful enough to enliven the dark room with light and fire.
But I saw now that the thin, yellow, hard face had changed sadly. She
fixed her two little black eyes on me, evidently startled by the
expression of my face.
"Look here, child, I ain't hurt to speak of, am I?"
"The doctor says you are hurt seriously."
My tone must have said more than my words did for she caught me by
the wrist and held me fast.
"He didn't say nothing about my-about it being dangerous? I ain't
dangerous, am I?"
I felt ready to sink.
"Oh Susan!" I gasped out; "you haven't any time to lose. You're
going, you're going!" "Going!" she cried; "going where? You don't
mean to say I'm a-dying? Why, it beats all my calculations. I was
going to live ever so years, and save up ever so much money, and when
my time come, I was going to put on my best fluted night-gown and
night-cap, and lay my head on my handsome pillow, and draw the
clothes up over me, neat and tidy, and die decent. But here's my bed
all in a toss, and my frills all in a crumple and my room all upside
down, and bottles of medicine setting around alongside of my vases,
and nobody here but you, just a girl, and nothing else!"
All this came out by jerks, as it were, and at intervals.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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