English fiction -- 19th century; Ireland -- Fiction; Short stories, English
“Well, to be sure, they all stapt ating at wanst, and began to stare at
me, and, faith, they almost looked me out of countenance; and I thought
to myself, it was not good manners at all, more betoken from furriners
which they call so mighty p’lite. But I never minded that, in regard o’
wantin’ the gridiron; and so says I, ‘I beg your pardon,’ says I, ‘for
the liberty I take, but it’s only bein’ in disthress in regard of
ating,’ says I, ‘that I made bowld to throuble yez, and if you could
lind me the loan of a gridiron,’ says I, ‘I’d be intirely obleeged to
ye.’
“By gor, they all stared at me twice worse nor before, and with that,
says I (knowing what was in their minds), ‘Indeed, it’s thrue for you,’
says I. ‘I’m tatthered to pieces, and God knows I look quare enough; but
it’s by raison of the storm,’ says I, ‘which dhruv us ashore here below,
and we’re all starvin’,’ says I.
“So then they began to look at each other again; and myself seeing at
once dirty thoughts was in their heads, and that they tuk me for a poor
beggar coming to crave charity, with that says I, ‘Oh, not at all,’ says
I, ‘by no manes--we have plenty of mate ourselves there below, and we’ll
dhress it,’ says I, ‘if you would be plased to lind us the loan of a
gridiron,’ says I, makin’ a low bow.
“Well, sir, with that, throth, they stared at me twice worse nor ever,
and, faith, I began to think that maybe the captain was wrong, and that
it was not France at all at all; and so says I, ‘I beg pardon, sir,’
says I to a fine ould man, with a head of hair as white as silver;
‘maybe I’m under a mistake,’ says I, ‘but I thought I was in France,
sir; aren’t you furriners?’ says I. ‘Parly voo frongsay?’
“‘We, munseer,’ says he.
“‘Then would you lind me the loan of a gridiron,’ says I, ‘if you
plase?’
“Oh, it was thin that they stared at me as if I had seven heads; and,
faith, myself began to feel flushed like and onaisy; and so says I,
makin’ a bow and scrape ag’in, ‘I know it’s a liberty I take, sir,’ says
I, ‘but it’s only in the regard of bein’ cast away; and if you plase,
sir,’ says I, ‘parly voo frongsay?’
“‘We, munseer,’ says he, mighty sharp.
“‘Then would you lind me the loan of a gridiron?’ says I, ‘and you’ll
obleege me.’
“Well, sir, the ould chap began to munseer me; but the divil a bit of a
gridiron he’d gi’ me; and so I began to think they wor all neygars, for
all their fine manners; and, throth, my blood begun to rise, and says I,
‘By my sowl, if it was you was in disthress,’ says I, ‘and if it was to
ould Ireland you kem, it’s not only the gridiron they’d give you, if you
axed it, but something to put an it, too, and the drop o’ dhrink into
the bargain, and cead mile failte.’
“Well, the word cead mile failte seemed to sthreck his heart, and the
ould chap cocked his ear, and so I thought I’d give him another offer,
and make him sinsible at last; and so says I, wanst more, quite slow,
that he might understand, ‘Parly--voo--frongsay, munseer?’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account